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SOIstartedfortowninthewagon,andwhenIwashalf-wayIseeawagoncoming,andsureenoughitwasTomSawyer,andIstoppedandwaitedtillhecomealong.Isays“Holdon!”
anditstoppedalongside,andhismouthopeneduplikeatrunk,andstayedso;andheswallowedtwoorthreetimeslikeapersonthat’sgotadrythroat,andthensays:
“Ihain’teverdoneyounoharm.Youknowthat.So,then,whatyouwanttocomebackandha’ntMEfor?”
Isays:
“Ihain’tcomeback–Ihain’tbeenGONE.”
Whenheheardmyvoiceitrightedhimupsome,buthewarn’tquitesatisfiedyet.Hesays:
“Don’tyouplaynothingonme,becauseIwouldn’tonyou.Honestinjun,youain’taghost?”
“Honestinjun,Iain’t,”Isays.
“Well–I–I–well,thatoughttosettleit,ofcourse;butIcan’tsomehowseemtounderstanditnoway.Lookyhere,warn’tyouevermurderedATALL?”
“No.Iwarn’tevermurderedatall–Iplayeditonthem.Youcomeinhereandfeelofmeifyoudon’tbelieveme.”
Sohedoneit;anditsatisfiedhim;andhewasthatgladtoseemeagainhedidn’tknowwhattodo.
Andhewantedtoknowallaboutitrightoff,becauseitwasagrandadventure,andmysterious,andsoithithimwherehelived.
ButIsaid,leaveitalonetillbyandby;andtoldhisdrivertowait,andwedroveoffalittlepiece,andItoldhimthekindofafixIwasin,andwhatdidhereckonwebetterdo?
Hesaid,lethimaloneaminute,anddon’tdisturbhim.
Sohethoughtandthought,andprettysoonhesays:
“It’sallright;I’vegotit.Takemytrunkinyourwagon,andletonit’syour’n;andyouturnbackandfoolalongslow,soastogettothehouseaboutthetimeyououghtto;andI’llgotowardstownapiece,andtakeafreshstart,andgetthereaquarterorahalfanhourafteryou;andyouneedn’tletontoknowmeatfirst.”
Isays:
“Allright;butwaitaminute.There’sonemorething–athingthatNOBODYdon’tknowbutme.
Andthatis,there’saniggerherethatI’ma-tryingtostealoutofslavery,andhisnameisJIM–oldMissWatson’sJim.”
Hesays:
”What!Why,Jimis–”
Hestoppedandwenttostudying.Isays:
“Iknowwhatyou’llsay.You’llsayit’sdirty,lowdownbusiness;butwhatifitis?I’mlowdown;andI’ma-goingtostealhim,andIwantyoukeepmumandnotleton.Willyou?”
Hiseyelitup,andhesays:
“I’llHELPyoustealhim!”
Well,Iletgoallholtsthen,likeIwasshot.
ItwasthemostastonishingspeechIeverheard–andI’mboundtosayTomSawyerfellconsiderableinmyestimation.OnlyIcouldn’tbelieveit.TomSawyeraNIGGER-STEALER!
“Oh,shucks!”Isays;“you’rejoking.”
“Iain’tjoking,either.”
“Well,then,”Isays,“jokingornojoking,ifyouhearanythingsaidaboutarunawaynigger,don’tforgettorememberthatYOUdon’tknownothingabouthim,andIdon’tknownothingabouthim.”
Thenwetookthetrunkandputitinmywagon,andhedroveoffhiswayandIdrovemine.
ButofcourseIforgotallaboutdrivingslowonaccountsofbeinggladandfullofthinking;soIgothomeaheaptooquickforthatlengthofatrip.
Theoldgentlemanwasatthedoor,andhesays:
“Why,thisiswonderful!Whoeverwouldathoughtitwasinthatmaretodoit?Iwishwe’datimedher.
Andshehain’tsweatedahair–notahair.It’swonderful.
Why,Iwouldn’ttakeahundreddollarsforthathorsenow–Iwouldn’t,honest;andyetI’dasoldherforfifteenbefore,andthought‘twasallshewasworth.”
That’sallhesaid.Hewastheinnocentest,bestoldsoulIeversee.
Butitwarn’tsurprising;becausehewarn’tonlyjustafarmer,hewasapreacher,too,andhadalittleone-horselogchurchdownbackoftheplantation,whichhebuiltithimselfathisownexpense,forachurchandschoolhouse,andneverchargednothingforhispreaching,anditwasworthit,too.
Therewasplentyotherfarmer-preacherslikethat,anddonethesameway,downSouth.
InabouthalfanhourTom’swagondroveuptothefrontstile,andAuntSallysheseeitthroughthewindow,becauseitwasonlyaboutfiftyyards,andsays:
“Why,there’ssomebodycome!Iwonderwho‘tis?Why,Idobelieveit’sastranger.Jimmy”(that’soneofthechildren)’“runandtellLizetoputonanotherplatefordinner.”
Everybodymadearushforthefrontdoor,because,ofcourse,astrangerdon’tcomeEVERYyear,andsohelaysovertheyaller-fever,forinterest,whenhedoescome.
Tomwasoverthestileandstartingforthehouse;thewagonwasspinninguptheroadforthevillage,andwewasallbunchedinthefrontdoor.
Tomhadhisstoreclotheson,andanaudience–andthatwasalwaysnutsforTomSawyer.
Inthemcircumstancesitwarn’tnotroubletohimtothrowinanamountofstylethatwassuitable.
Hewarn’taboytomeekyalongupthatyardlikeasheep;no,hecomeca’mandimportant,liketheram.
Whenhegota-frontofusheliftshishateversograciousanddainty,likeitwasthelidofaboxthathadbutterfliesasleepinitandhedidn’twanttodisturbthem,andsays:
“Mr.ArchibaldNichols,Ipresume?”
“No,myboy,”saystheoldgentleman,“I’msorrytosay‘tyourdriverhasdeceivedyou;Nichols’splaceisdownamatterofthreemilemore.Comein,comein.”
Tomhetookalookbackoverhisshoulder,andsays,"Toolate-he'soutofsight."
"Yes,he'sgone,myson,andyoumustcomeinandeatyourdinnerwithus;andthenwe'llhitchupandtakeyoudowntoNichols's."
“Oh,ICAN’Tmakeyousomuchtrouble;Icouldn’tthinkofit.I’llwalk–Idon’tmindthedistance.”
“Butwewon’tLETyouwalk–itwouldn’tbeSouthernhospitalitytodoit.Comerightin.”
“Oh,DO,”saysAuntSally;“itain’tabitoftroubletous,notabitintheworld.Youmuststay.
It’salong,dustythreemile,andwecan’tletyouwalk.
And,besides,I’vealreadytold‘emtoputonanotherplatewhenIseeyoucoming;soyoumustn’tdisappointus.
Comerightinandmakeyourselfathome.”
SoTomhethankedthemveryheartyandhandsome,andlethimselfbepersuaded,andcomein;andwhenhewasinhesaidhewasastrangerfromHicksville,Ohio,andhisnamewasWilliamThompson–andhemadeanotherbow.
Well,herunon,andon,andon,makingupstuffaboutHicksvilleandeverybodyinithecouldinvent,andIgettingalittlenervious,andwonderinghowthiswasgoingtohelpmeoutofmyscrape;andatlast,stilltalkingalong,hereachedoverandkissedAuntSallyrightonthemouth,andthensettledbackagaininhischaircomfortable,andwasgoingontalking;butshejumpedupandwipeditoffwiththebackofherhand,andsays:
“Youowdaciouspuppy!”
Helookedkindofhurt,andsays:
“I’msurprisedatyou,m’am.”
“You’res’rp–Why,whatdoyoureckonIam?I’veagoodnotiontotakeand–Say,whatdoyoumeanbykissingme?”
Helookedkindofhumble,andsays:
“Ididn’tmeannothing,m’am.Ididn’tmeannoharm.I–I–thoughtyou’dlikeit.”
“Why,youbornfool!”Shetookupthespinningstick,anditlookedlikeitwasallshecoulddotokeepfromgivinghimacrackwithit.“WhatmadeyouthinkI’dlikeit?”
“Well,Idon’tknow.Only,they–they–toldmeyouwould.”
“THEYtoldyouIwould.Whoevertoldyou’sANOTHERlunatic.Ineverheardthebeatofit.Who’sTHEY?”
“Why,everybody.Theyallsaidso,m’am.”
Itwasallshecoulddotoholdin;andhereyessnapped,andherfingersworkedlikeshewantedtoscratchhim;andshesays:
“Who’s‘everybody’?Outwiththeirnames,orther’llbeanidiotshort.”
Hegotupandlookeddistressed,andfumbledhishat,andsays:
“I’msorry,andIwarn’texpectingit.Theytoldmeto.Theyalltoldmeto.
Theyallsaid,kissher;andsaidshe’dlikeit.Theyallsaidit–everyoneofthem.
ButI’msorry,m’am,andIwon’tdoitnomore–Iwon’t,honest.”
“Youwon’t,won’tyou?Well,Ish’dRECKONyouwon’t!”
“No’m,I’mhonestaboutit;Iwon’teverdoitagain–tillyouaskme.”
“TillIASKyou!Well,Ineverseethebeatofitinmyborndays!Ilayyou’llbetheMethusalem-numskullofcreationbeforeeverIaskyou–orthelikesofyou.”
“Well,”hesays,“itdoessurprisemeso.Ican’tmakeitout,somehow.
Theysaidyouwould,andIthoughtyouwould.
But–”Hestoppedandlookedaroundslow,likehewishedhecouldrunacrossafriendlyeyesomewheres,andfetchedupontheoldgentleman’s,andsays,“Didn’tYOUthinkshe’dlikemetokissher,sir?”
“Why,no;I–I–well,no,Ib’lieveIdidn’t.”
Thenhelooksonaroundthesamewaytome,andsays:
“Tom,didn’tYOUthinkAuntSally‘dopenoutherarmsandsay,‘SidSawyer–’”
“Myland!”shesays,breakinginandjumpingforhim,“youimpudentyoungrascal,tofoolabodyso–”andwasgoingtohughim,buthefendedheroff,andsays:
“No,nottillyou’veaskedmefirst.”
Soshedidn’tlosenotime,butaskedhim;andhuggedhimandkissedhimoverandoveragain,andthenturnedhimovertotheoldman,andhetookwhatwasleft.
Andaftertheygotalittlequietagainshesays:
“Why,dearme,Ineverseesuchasurprise.Wewarn’tlookingforYOUatall,butonlyTom.Sisneverwrotetomeaboutanybodycomingbuthim.”
“It’sbecauseitwarn’tINTENDEDforanyofustocomebutTom,”hesays;“butIbeggedandbegged,andatthelastminutesheletmecome,too;so,comingdowntheriver,meandTomthoughtitwouldbeafirst-ratesurpriseforhimtocomeheretothehousefirst,andformetobyandbytagalonganddropin,andletontobeastranger.Butitwasamistake,AuntSally.
Thisain’tnohealthyplaceforastrangertocome.”
“No–notimpudentwhelps,Sid.Yououghttohadyourjawsboxed;Ihain’tbeensoputoutsinceIdon’tknowwhen.
ButIdon’tcare,Idon’tmindtheterms–I’dbewillingtostandathousandsuchjokestohaveyouhere.Well,tothinkofthatperformance!
Idon’tdenyit,Iwasmostputrifiedwithastonishmentwhenyougivemethatsmack.”
Wehaddinneroutinthatbroadopenpassagebetwixtthehouseandthekitchen;andtherewasthingsenoughonthattableforsevenfamilies–andallhot,too;noneofyourflabby,toughmeatthat’slaidinacupboardinadampcellarallnightandtasteslikeahunkofoldcoldcannibalinthemorning.
UncleSilasheaskedaprettylongblessingoverit,butitwasworthit;anditdidn’tcoolitabit,neither,thewayI’veseenthemkindofinterruptionsdolotsoftimes.
Therewasaconsiderablegooddealoftalkalltheafternoon,andmeandTomwasonthelookoutallthetime;butitwarn’tnouse,theydidn’thappentosaynothingaboutanyrunawaynigger,andwewasafraidtotrytoworkuptoit.
Butatsupper,atnight,oneofthelittleboyssays:
“Pa,mayn’tTomandSidandmegototheshow?”
“No,”saystheoldman,“Ireckonthereain’tgoingtobeany;andyoucouldn’tgoiftherewas;becausetherunawayniggertoldBurtonandmeallaboutthatscandalousshow,andBurtonsaidhewouldtellthepeople;soIreckonthey’vedrovetheowdaciousloafersoutoftownbeforethistime.”
Sothereitwas!–butIcouldn’thelpit.
Tomandmewastosleepinthesameroomandbed;so,beingtired,webidgood-nightandwentuptobedrightaftersupper,andclumboutofthewindowanddownthelightning-rod,andshovedforthetown;forIdidn’tbelieveanybodywasgoingtogivethekingandthedukeahint,andsoifIdidn’thurryupandgivethemonethey’dgetintotroublesure.
OntheroadTomhetoldmeallabouthowitwasreckonedIwasmurdered,andhowpapdisappearedprettysoon,anddidn’tcomebacknomore,andwhatastirtherewaswhenJimrunaway;andItoldTomallaboutourRoyalNonesuchrapscallions,andasmuchoftheraftvoyageasIhadtimeto;andaswestruckintothetownandupthroughthe–herecomesaragingrushofpeoplewithtorches,andanawfulwhoopingandyelling,andbangingtinpansandblowinghorns;andwejumpedtoonesidetoletthemgoby;andastheywentbyIseetheyhadthekingandthedukeastraddleofarail–thatis,IknoweditWASthekingandtheduke,thoughtheywasallovertarandfeathers,anddidn’tlooklikenothingintheworldthatwashuman–justlookedlikeacoupleofmonstrousbigsoldier-plumes.
Well,itmademesicktoseeit;andIwassorryforthempoorpitifulrascals,itseemedlikeIcouldn’teverfeelanyhardnessagainstthemanymoreintheworld.Itwasadreadfulthingtosee.
HumanbeingsCANbeawfulcrueltooneanother.
Weseewewastoolate–couldn’tdonogood.
Weaskedsomestragglersaboutit,andtheysaideverybodywenttotheshowlookingveryinnocent;andlaidlowandkeptdarktillthepooroldkingwasinthemiddleofhiscavortingsonthestage;thensomebodygiveasignal,andthehouseroseupandwentforthem.
Sowepokedalongbackhome,andIwarn’tfeelingsobrashasIwasbefore,butkindofornery,andhumble,andtoblame,somehow–thoughIhadn’tdonenothing.
Butthat’salwaystheway;itdon’tmakenodifferencewhetheryoudorightorwrong,aperson’sconscienceain’tgotnosense,andjustgoesforhimanyway.
IfIhadayallerdogthatdidn’tknownomorethanaperson’sconsciencedoesIwouldpisonhim.
Ittakesupmoreroomthanalltherestofaperson’sinsides,andyetain’tnogood,nohow.TomSawyerhesaysthesame.
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