English
TWOorthreedaysandnightswentby;IreckonImightsaytheyswumby,theyslidalongsoquietandsmoothandlovely.Hereisthewayweputinthetime.
Itwasamonstrousbigriverdownthere–sometimesamileandahalfwide;werunnights,andlaidupandhiddaytimes;soonasnightwasmostgonewestoppednavigatingandtiedup–nearlyalwaysinthedeadwaterunderatowhead;andthencutyoungcottonwoodsandwillows,andhidtheraftwiththem.Thenwesetoutthelines.
Nextweslidintotheriverandhadaswim,soastofreshenupandcooloff;thenwesetdownonthesandybottomwherethewaterwasaboutkneedeep,andwatchedthedaylightcome.
Notasoundanywheres–perfectlystill–justlikethewholeworldwasasleep,onlysometimesthebullfrogsa-cluttering,maybe.
Thefirstthingtosee,lookingawayoverthewater,wasakindofdullline–thatwasthewoodsont’otherside;youcouldn’tmakenothingelseout;thenapaleplaceinthesky;thenmorepalenessspreadingaround;thentheriversoftenedupawayoff,andwarn’tblackanymore,butgray;youcouldseelittledarkspotsdriftingalongeversofaraway–tradingscows,andsuchthings;andlongblackstreaks–rafts;sometimesyoucouldhearasweepscreaking;orjumbledupvoices,itwassostill,andsoundscomesofar;andbyandbyyoucouldseeastreakonthewaterwhichyouknowbythelookofthestreakthatthere’sasnagthereinaswiftcurrentwhichbreaksonitandmakesthatstreaklookthatway;andyouseethemistcurlupoffofthewater,andtheeastreddensup,andtheriver,andyoumakeoutalog-cabinintheedgeofthewoods,awayonthebankont’othersideoftheriver,beingawoodyard,likely,andpiledbythemcheatssoyoucanthrowadogthroughitanywheres;thenthenicebreezespringsup,andcomesfanningyoufromoverthere,socoolandfreshandsweettosmellonaccountofthewoodsandtheflowers;butsometimesnotthatway,becausethey’veleftdeadfishlayingaround,garsandsuch,andtheydogetprettyrank;andnextyou’vegotthefullday,andeverythingsmilinginthesun,andthesong-birdsjustgoingit!
Alittlesmokecouldn’tbenoticednow,sowewouldtakesomefishoffofthelinesandcookupahotbreakfast.
Andafterwardswewouldwatchthelonesomenessoftheriver,andkindoflazyalong,andbyandbylazyofftosleep.
Wakeupbyandby,andlooktoseewhatdoneit,andmaybeseeasteamboatcoughingalongup-stream,sofarofftowardstheothersideyoucouldn’ttellnothingaboutheronlywhethershewasastern-wheelorside-wheel;thenforaboutanhourtherewouldn’tbenothingtohearnornothingtosee–justsolidlonesomeness.
Nextyou’dseearaftslidingby,awayoffyonder,andmaybeagalootonitchopping,becausethey’remostalwaysdoingitonaraft;you’dseetheaxeflashandcomedown–youdon’thearnothing;youseethataxegoupagain,andbythetimeit’sabovetheman’sheadthenyouheartheK’CHUNK!
–ithadtookallthattimetocomeoverthewater.
Sowewouldputintheday,lazyingaround,listeningtothestillness.
Oncetherewasathickfog,andtheraftsandthingsthatwentbywasbeatingtinpanssothesteamboatswouldn’trunoverthem.
Ascoworaraftwentbysoclosewecouldhearthemtalkingandcussingandlaughing–heardthemplain;butwecouldn’tseenosignofthem;itmadeyoufeelcrawly;itwaslikespiritscarryingonthatwayintheair.
Jimsaidhebelieveditwasspirits;butIsays:
“No;spiritswouldn’tsay,‘Dernthedernfog.’”
Soonasitwasnightoutweshoved;whenwegotherouttoaboutthemiddleweletheralone,andletherfloatwhereverthecurrentwantedherto;thenwelitthepipes,anddangledourlegsinthewater,andtalkedaboutallkindsofthings–wewasalwaysnaked,dayandnight,wheneverthemosquitoeswouldletus–thenewclothesBuck’sfolksmadeformewastoogoodtobecomfortable,andbesidesIdidn’tgomuchonclothes,nohow.
Sometimeswe’dhavethatwholeriveralltoourselvesforthelongesttime.
Yonderwasthebanksandtheislands,acrossthewater;andmaybeaspark–whichwasacandleinacabinwindow;andsometimesonthewateryoucouldseeasparkortwo–onaraftorascow,youknow;andmaybeyoucouldhearafiddleorasongcomingoverfromoneofthemcrafts.It’slovelytoliveonaraft.
Wehadtheskyupthere,allspeckledwithstars,andweusedtolayonourbacksandlookupatthem,anddiscussaboutwhethertheywasmadeoronlyjusthappened.
Jimheallowedtheywasmade,butIallowedtheyhappened;IjudgeditwouldhavetooktoolongtoMAKEsomany.
JimsaidthemooncouldaLAIDthem;well,thatlookedkindofreasonable,soIdidn’tsaynothingagainstit,becauseI’veseenafroglaymostasmany,soofcourseitcouldbedone.
Weusedtowatchthestarsthatfell,too,andseethemstreakdown.
Jimallowedthey’dgotspoiledandwashoveoutofthenest.
Onceortwiceofanightwewouldseeasteamboatslippingalonginthedark,andnowandthenshewouldbelchawholeworldofsparksupoutofherchimbleys,andtheywouldraindownintheriverandlookawfulpretty;thenshewouldturnacornerandherlightswouldwinkoutandherpowwowshutoffandleavetheriverstillagain;andbyandbyherwaveswouldgettous,alongtimeaftershewasgone,andjoggletheraftabit,andafterthatyouwouldn’thearnothingforyoucouldn’ttellhowlong,exceptmaybefrogsorsomething.
Aftermidnightthepeopleonshorewenttobed,andthenfortwoorthreehourstheshoreswasblack–nomoresparksinthecabinwindows.
Thesesparkswasourclock–thefirstonethatshowedagainmeantmorningwascoming,sowehuntedaplacetohideandtieuprightaway.
OnemorningaboutdaybreakIfoundacanoeandcrossedoverachutetothemainshore–itwasonlytwohundredyards–andpaddledaboutamileupacrickamongstthecypresswoods,toseeifIcouldn’tgetsomeberries.
JustasIwaspassingaplacewhereakindofacowpathcrossedthecrick,herecomesacoupleofmentearingupthepathastightastheycouldfootit.
IthoughtIwasagoner,forwheneveranybodywasafteranybodyIjudgeditwasME–ormaybeJim.
Iwasabouttodigoutfromthereinahurry,buttheywasprettyclosetomethen,andsungoutandbeggedmetosavetheirlives–saidtheyhadn’tbeendoingnothing,andwasbeingchasedforit–saidtherewasmenanddogsa-coming.
Theywantedtojumprightin,butIsays:
“Don’tyoudoit.Idon’thearthedogsandhorsesyet;you’vegottimetocrowdthroughthebrushandgetupthecrickalittleways;thenyoutaketothewaterandwadedowntomeandgetin–that’llthrowthedogsoffthescent.”
Theydoneit,andsoonastheywasaboardIlitoutforourtowhead,andinaboutfiveortenminutesweheardthedogsandthemenawayoff,shouting.
Weheardthemcomealongtowardsthecrick,butcouldn’tseethem;theyseemedtostopandfoolaroundawhile;then,aswegotfurtherandfurtherawayallthetime,wecouldn’thardlyhearthematall;bythetimewehadleftamileofwoodsbehindusandstrucktheriver,everythingwasquiet,andwepaddledovertothetowheadandhidinthecottonwoodsandwassafe.
Oneofthesefellowswasaboutseventyorupwards,andhadabaldheadandverygraywhiskers.
Hehadanoldbattered-upslouchhaton,andagreasybluewoollenshirt,andraggedoldbluejeansbritchesstuffedintohisboot-tops,andhome-knitgalluses–no,heonlyhadone.
Hehadanoldlong-tailedbluejeanscoatwithslickbrassbuttonsflungoverhisarm,andbothofthemhadbig,fat,ratty-lookingcarpet-bags.
Theotherfellowwasaboutthirty,anddressedaboutasornery.Afterbreakfastwealllaidoffandtalked,andthefirstthingthatcomeoutwasthatthesechapsdidn’tknowoneanother.
“Whatgotyouintotrouble?”saysthebaldheadtot’otherchap.
“Well,I’dbeensellinganarticletotakethetartarofftheteeth–anditdoestakeitoff,too,andgenerlytheenamelalongwithit–butIstayedaboutonenightlongerthanIoughtto,andwasjustintheactofslidingoutwhenIranacrossyouonthetrailthissideoftown,andyoutoldmetheywerecoming,andbeggedmetohelpyoutogetoff.
SoItoldyouIwasexpectingtroublemyself,andwouldscatteroutWITHyou.That’sthewholeyarn–what’syourn?
“Well,I’dbena-running’alittletemperancerevivalthar‘boutaweek,andwasthepetofthewomenfolks,bigandlittle,forIwasmakin’itmightywarmfortherummies,ITELLyou,andtakin’asmuchasfiveorsixdollarsanight–tencentsahead,childrenandniggersfree–andbusinessa-growin’allthetime,whensomehoworanotheralittlereportgotaroundlastnightthatIhadawayofputtin’inmytimewithaprivatejugonthesly.
Aniggerroustedmeoutthismornin’,andtoldmethepeoplewasgetherin’onthequietwiththeirdogsandhorses,andthey’dbealongprettysoonandgiveme‘bouthalfanhour’sstart,andthenrunmedowniftheycould;andiftheygotmethey’dtarandfeathermeandridemeonarail,sure.
Ididn’twaitfornobreakfast–Iwarn’thungry.”
“Oldman,”saidtheyoungone,“Ireckonwemightdouble-teamittogether;whatdoyouthink?”
“Iain’tundisposed.What’syourline–mainly?”
“Jourprinterbytrade;doalittleinpatentmedicines;theater-actor–tragedy,youknow;takeaturntomesmerismandphrenologywhenthere’sachance;teachsinging-geographyschoolforachange;slingalecturesometimes–oh,Idolotsofthings–mostanythingthatcomeshandy,soitain’twork.What’syourlay?”
“I’vedoneconsiderbleinthedoctoringwayinmytime.
Layin’ono’handsismybestholt–forcancerandparalysis,andsichthings;andIk’ntellafortuneprettygoodwhenI’vegotsomebodyalongtofindoutthefactsforme.
Preachin’smyline,too,andworkin’camp-meetin’s,andmissionaryin’around.”
Nobodyneversaidanythingforawhile;thentheyoungmanhoveasighandsays:
“Alas!”
“What‘reyoualassin’about?”saysthebaldhead.
“TothinkIshouldhavelivedtobeleadingsuchalife,andbedegradeddownintosuchcompany.”Andhebeguntowipethecornerofhiseyewitharag.
“Dernyourskin,ain’tthecompanygoodenoughforyou?”saysthebaldhead,prettypertanduppish.
”Yes,itISgoodenoughforme;it’sasgoodasIdeserve;forwhofetchedmesolowwhenIwassohigh?Ididmyself.
Idon’tblameYOU,gentlemen–farfromit;Idon’tblameanybody.Ideserveitall.
Letthecoldworlddoitsworst;onethingIknow–there’sagravesomewhereforme.
Theworldmaygoonjustasit’salwaysdone,andtakeeverythingfromme–lovedones,property,everything;butitcan’ttakethat.
SomedayI’llliedowninitandforgetitall,andmypoorbrokenheartwillbeatrest.”Hewentona-wiping.
“Drotyourporebrokenheart,”saysthebaldhead;“whatareyouheavingyourporebrokenheartatUSf’r?WEhain’tdonenothing.”
“No,Iknowyouhaven’t.Iain’tblamingyou,gentlemen.Ibroughtmyselfdown–yes,Ididitmyself.It’srightIshouldsuffer–perfectlyright–Idon’tmakeanymoan.”
“Broughtyoudownfromwhar?Wharwasyoubroughtdownfrom?”
“Ah,youwouldnotbelieveme;theworldneverbelieves–letitpass–‘tisnomatter.Thesecretofmybirth–”
“Thesecretofyourbirth!Doyoumeantosay–”
“Gentlemen,”saystheyoungman,verysolemn,“Iwillrevealittoyou,forIfeelImayhaveconfidenceinyou.ByrightsIamaduke!”
Jim’seyesbuggedoutwhenheheardthat;andIreckonminedid,too.Thenthebaldheadsays:“No!youcan’tmeanit?”
“Yes.Mygreat-grandfather,eldestsonoftheDukeofBridgewater,fledtothiscountryabouttheendofthelastcentury,tobreathethepureairoffreedom;marriedhere,anddied,leavingason,hisownfatherdyingaboutthesametime.
Thesecondsonofthelatedukeseizedthetitlesandestates–theinfantrealdukewasignored.
Iamthelinealdescendantofthatinfant–IamtherightfulDukeofBridgewater;andhereamI,forlorn,tornfrommyhighestate,huntedofmen,despisedbythecoldworld,ragged,worn,heart-broken,anddegradedtothecompanionshipoffelonsonaraft!”
Jimpitiedhimeversomuch,andsodidI.
Wetriedtocomforthim,buthesaiditwarn’tmuchuse,hecouldn’tbemuchcomforted;saidifwewasamindtoacknowledgehim,thatwoulddohimmoregoodthanmostanythingelse;sowesaidwewould,ifhewouldtellushow.
Hesaidweoughttobowwhenwespoketohim,andsay“YourGrace,”or“MyLord,”or“YourLordship”–andhewouldn’tminditifwecalledhimplain“Bridgewater,”which,hesaid,wasatitleanyway,andnotaname;andoneofusoughttowaitonhimatdinner,anddoanylittlethingforhimhewanteddone.
Well,thatwasalleasy,sowedoneit.AllthroughdinnerJimstoodaroundandwaitedonhim,andsays,“Willyo’Gracehavesomeo’disorsomeo’dat?”
andsoon,andabodycouldseeitwasmightypleasingtohim.
Buttheoldmangotprettysilentbyandby–didn’thavemuchtosay,anddidn’tlookprettycomfortableoverallthatpettingthatwasgoingonaroundthatduke.
Heseemedtohavesomethingonhismind.So,alongintheafternoon,hesays:
“Lookyhere,Bilgewater,”hesays,“I’mnationsorryforyou,butyouain’ttheonlypersonthat’shadtroubleslikethat.”
“No?”
“Noyouain’t.Youain’ttheonlypersonthat’sbensnakeddownwrongfullyout’nahighplace.”
“Alas!”
“No,youain’ttheonlypersonthat’shadasecretofhisbirth.”And,byjings,HEbeginstocry.
“Hold!Whatdoyoumean?”
“Bilgewater,kinItrustyou?”saystheoldman,stillsortofsobbing.
“Tothebitterdeath!”Hetooktheoldmanbythehandandsqueezedit,andsays,“Thatsecretofyourbeing:speak!”
“Bilgewater,IamthelateDauphin!”
Youbetyou,Jimandmestaredthistime.Thenthedukesays:
“Youarewhat?”
“Yes,myfriend,itistootrue–youreyesislookin’atthisverymomentontheporedisappearedDauphin,LooytheSeventeen,sonofLooytheSixteenandMarryAntonette.”
“You!Atyourage!No!Youmeanyou’rethelateCharlemagne;youmustbesixorsevenhundredyearsold,attheveryleast.”
“Troublehasdoneit,Bilgewater,troublehasdoneit;troublehasbrungthesegrayhairsandthisprematurebalditude.
Yes,gentlemen,youseebeforeyou,inbluejeansandmisery,thewanderin’,exiled,trampled-on,andsufferin’rightfulKingofFrance.”
Well,hecriedandtookonsothatmeandJimdidn’tknowhardlywhattodo,wewassosorry–andsogladandproudwe’dgothimwithus,too.
Sowesetin,likewedonebeforewiththeduke,andtriedtocomfortHIM.
Buthesaiditwarn’tnouse,nothingbuttobedeadanddonewithitallcoulddohimanygood;thoughhesaiditoftenmadehimfeeleasierandbetterforawhileifpeopletreatedhimaccordingtohisrights,andgotdownononekneetospeaktohim,andalwayscalledhim“YourMajesty,”andwaitedonhimfirstatmeals,anddidn’tsetdowninhispresencetillheaskedthem.
SoJimandmesettomajestyinghim,anddoingthisandthatandt’otherforhim,andstandinguptillhetolduswemightsetdown.
Thisdonehimheapsofgood,andsohegotcheerfulandcomfortable.
Butthedukekindofsouredonhim,anddidn’tlookabitsatisfiedwiththewaythingswasgoing;still,thekingactedrealfriendlytowardshim,andsaidtheduke’sgreat-grandfatherandalltheotherDukesofBilgewaterwasagooddealthoughtofbyHISfather,andwasallowedtocometothepalaceconsiderable;butthedukestayedhuffyagoodwhile,tillbyandbythekingsays:
“Likeasnotwegottobetogetherablamedlongtimeonthish-yerraft,Bilgewater,andsowhat’stheuseo’yourbein’sour?It‘llonlymakethingsoncomfortable.
Itain’tmyfaultIwarn’tbornaduke,itain’tyourfaultyouwarn’tbornaking–sowhat’stheusetoworry?
Makethebesto’thingsthewayyoufind‘em,saysI–that’smymotto.
Thisain’tnobadthingthatwe’vestruckhere–plentygrubandaneasylife–come,giveusyourhand,duke,andle’sallbefriends.”
Thedukedoneit,andJimandmewasprettygladtoseeit.
Ittookawayalltheuncomfortablenessandwefeltmightygoodoverit,becauseitwouldabeenamiserablebusinesstohaveanyunfriendlinessontheraft;forwhatyouwant,aboveallthings,onaraft,isforeverybodytobesatisfied,andfeelrightandkindtowardstheothers.
Itdidn’ttakemelongtomakeupmymindthattheseliarswarn’tnokingsnordukesatall,butjustlow-downhumbugsandfrauds.
ButIneversaidnothing,neverleton;keptittomyself;it’sthebestway;thenyoudon’thavenoquarrels,anddon’tgetintonotrouble.
Iftheywantedustocallthemkingsanddukes,Ihadn’tnoobjections,‘longasitwouldkeeppeaceinthefamily;anditwarn’tnousetotellJim,soIdidn’ttellhim.
IfIneverlearntnothingelseoutofpap,Ilearntthatthebestwaytogetalongwithhiskindofpeopleistoletthemhavetheirownway.
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