English
THEEVENINGafterthefuneral,myyoungladyandIwereseatedinthelibrary;nowmusingmournfully—oneofusdespairingly—onourloss,nowventuringconjecturesastothegloomyfuture.
WehadjustagreedthebestdestinywhichcouldawaitCatherine,wouldbeapermissiontocontinueresidentattheGrange;atleast,duringLinton’slife:hebeingallowedtojoinherthere,andItoremainashousekeeper.
Thatseemedrathertoofavourableanarrangementtobehopedfor:andyetIdidhope,andbegantocheerupundertheprospectofretainingmyhomeandmyemployment,and,aboveall,mybelovedyoungmistress;whenaservant—oneofthediscardedones,notyetdeparted—rushedhastilyin,andsaid“thatdevilHeathcliff”wascomingthroughthecourt:shouldhefastenthedoorinhisface?
Ifwehadbeenmadenoughtoorderthatproceeding,wehadnottime.
Hemadenoceremonyofknockingorannouncinghisname:hewasmaster,andavailedhimselfofthemaster’sprivilegetowalkstraightin,withoutsayingaword.
Thesoundofourinformant’svoicedirectedhimtothelibrary:heentered,andmotioninghimout,shutthedoor.
Itwasthesameroomintowhichhehadbeenushered,asaguest,eighteenyearsbefore:thesamemoonshonethroughthewindow;andthesameautumnlandscapelayoutside.
Wehadnotyetlightedacandle,butalltheapartmentwasvisible,eventotheportraitsonthewall:thesplendidheadofMrs.Linton,andthegracefuloneofherhusband.Heathcliffadvancedtothehearth.
Timehadlittlealteredhispersoneither.
Therewasthesameman:hisdarkfacerathersallowerandmorecomposed,hisframeastoneortwoheavier,perhaps,andnootherdifference.
Catherinehadrisen,withanimpulsetodashout,whenshesawhim.
“Stop!”hesaid,arrestingherbythearm.“Nomorerunningsaway!Wherewouldyougo?
I’mcometofetchyouhome;andIhopeyou’llbeadutifuldaughter,andnotencouragemysontofurtherdisobedience.
IwasembarrassedhowtopunishhimwhenIdiscoveredhispartinthebusiness:he’ssuchacobweb,apinchwouldannihilatehim;butyou’llseebyhislookthathehasreceivedhisdue!
Ibroughthimdownoneevening,thedaybeforeyesterday,andjustsethiminachair,andnevertouchedhimafterwards.
IsentHaretonout,andwehadtheroomtoourselves.
Intwohours,IcalledJosephtocarryhimupagain;andsincethenmypresenceisaspotentonhisnervesasaghost;andIfancyheseesmeoften,thoughIamnotnear.
Haretonsayshewakesandshrieksinthenightbythehourtogether,andcallsyoutoprotecthimfromme;and,whetheryoulikeyourpreciousmateornot,youmustcome;he’syourconcernnow;Iyieldallmyinterestinhimtoyou.”
“WhynotletCatherinecontinuehere?”Ipleaded,“andsendMasterLintontoher.Asyouhatethemboth,you’dnotmissthem:theycanonlybeadailyplaguetoyourunnaturalheart.”
“I’mseekingatenantfortheGrange,”heanswered;“andIwantmychildrenaboutme,tobesure.
Besides,thatlassowesmeherservicesforherbread.
I’mnotgoingtonurtureherinluxuryandidlenessafterLintonhasgone.
Makehasteandgetready,now;anddon’tobligemetocompelyou.”
“Ishall,”saidCatherine.“LintonisallIhavetoloveintheworld,andthoughyouhavedonewhatyoucouldtomakehimhatefultome,andmetohim,youcannotmakeushateeachother.
AndIdefyyoutohurthimwhenIamby,andIdefyyoutofrightenme!”
“Youareaboastfulchampion,”repliedHeathcliff;“butIdon’tlikeyouwellenoughtohurthim:youshallgetthefullbenefitofthetorment,aslongasitlasts.
ItisnotIwhowillmakehimhatefultoyou—itishisownsweetspirit.
He’sasbitterasgallatyourdesertionanditsconsequences:don’texpectthanksforthisnobledevotion.
IheardhimdrawapleasantpicturetoZillahofwhathewoulddoifhewereasstrongasI:theinclinationisthere,andhisveryweaknesswillsharpenhiswitstofindasubstituteforstrength.”
“Iknowhehasabadnature,”saidCatherine:“he’syourson.
ButI’mgladI’veabetter,toforgiveit;andIknowhelovesme,andforthatreasonIlovehim.
Mr.Heathcliff,youhavenobodytoloveyou;and,howevermiserableyoumakeus,weshallstillhavetherevengeofthinkingthatyourcrueltyarisesfromyourgreatermisery.Youaremiserable,areyounot?
Lonely,likethedevil,andenviouslikehim?
Nobodylovesyou—nobodywillcryforyouwhenyoudie!Iwouldn’tbeyou!”
Catherinespokewithakindofdrearytriumph:sheseemedtohavemadeuphermindtoenterintothespiritofherfuturefamily,anddrawpleasurefromthegriefsofherenemies.
“Youshallbesorrytobeyourselfpresently,”saidherfather-in-law,“ifyoustandthereanotherminute.Begone,witch,andgetyourthings!”
Shescornfullywithdrew.Inherabsence,IbegantobegforZillah’splaceattheHeights,offeringtoresignminetoher;buthewouldsufferitonnoaccount.
Hebidmebesilent;andthen,forthefirsttime,allowedhimselfaglanceroundtheroomandalookatthepictures.HavingstudiedMrs.Linton’s,hesaid:
“Ishallhavethathome.NotbecauseIneedit,but-”Heturnedabruptlytothefire,andcontinued,withwhat,forlackofabetterword,Imustcallasmile—“I’lltellyouwhatIdidyesterday!
Igotthesexton,whowasdiggingLinton’sgrave,toremovetheearthoffhercoffin-lid,andIopenedit.
Ithought,once,Iwouldhavestayedthere:whenIsawherfaceagain—itishersyet!
—hehadhardworktostirme;buthesaiditwouldchangeiftheairblewonit,andsoIstruckonesideofthecoffinloose,andcovereditup:notLinton’sside,damnhim!Iwishhe’dbeensolderedinlead.
AndIbribedthesextontopullitawaywhenI’mlaidthere,andslidemineouttoo;I’llhaveitmadeso:andthen,bythetimeLintongetstoushe’llnotknowwhichiswhich!”
“Youwereverywicked,Mr.Heathcliff!”Iexclaimed,“wereyounotashamedtodisturbthedead?”
“Idisturbednobody,Nelly,”hereplied;“andIgavesomeeasetomyself.
Ishallbeagreatdealmorecomfortablenow;andyou’llhaveabetterchanceofkeepingmeunderground,whenIgetthere.Disturbedher?No!
shehasdisturbedme,nightandday,througheighteenyears—incessantly—remorselessly—tillyesternight;andyesternightIwastranquil.
IdreamtIwassleepingthelastsleepbythatsleeper,withmyheartstoppedandmycheekfrozenagainsthers.”
“Andifshehadbeendissolvedintoearth,orworse,whatwouldyouhavedreamtofthen?”Isaid.
“Ofdissolvingwithher,andbeingmorehappystill!”heanswered.
“DoyousupposeIdreadanychangeofthatsort?
Iexpectedsuchatransformationonraisingthelid:butI’mbetterpleasedthatitshouldnotcommencetillIshareit.
Besides,unlessIhadreceivedadistinctimpressionofherpassionlessfeatures,thatstrangefeelingwouldhardlyhavebeenremoved.Itbeganoddly.
YouknowIwaswildaftershedied;andeternally,fromdawntodawn,prayinghertoreturntomeherspirit!
Ihaveastrongfaithinghosts:Ihaveaconvictionthattheycan,anddo,existamongus!
Thedayshewasburiedtherecameafallofsnow.
IntheeveningIwenttothechurchyard.
Itblewbleakaswinter—allroundwassolitary.
Ididn’tfearthatherfoolofahusbandwouldwanderupthedensolate;andnooneelsehadbusinesstobringthemthere.
Beingalone,andconscioustwoyardsoflooseearthwasthesolebarrierbetweenus,Isaidtomyself—‘I’llhaveherinmyarmsagain!
Ifshebecold,I’llthinkitisthisnorthwindthatchillsme;andifshebemotionless,itissleep.’
Igotaspadefromthetoolhouse,andbegantodelvewithallmymight—itscrapedthecoffin;Ifelltoworkwithmyhands;thewoodcommencedcrackingaboutthescrews;Iwasonthepointofattainingmyobject,whenitseemedthatIheardasighfromsomeoneabove,closeattheedgeofthegrave,andbendingdown.
‘IfIcanonlygetthisoff,’Imuttered,‘Iwishtheymayshovelintheearthoverusboth!’
andIwrenchedatitmoredesperatelystill.
Therewasanothersigh,closeatmyear.
Iappearedtofeelthewarmbreathofitdisplacingthesleet-ladenwind.
Iknewnolivingthinginfleshandbloodwasby;but,ascertainlyasyouperceivetheapproachtosomesubstantialbodyinthedark,thoughitcannotbediscerned,socertainlyIfeltthatCathywasthere:notunderme,butontheearth.
Asuddensenseofreliefflowedfrommyheartthrougheverylimb.
Irelinquishedmylabourofagony,andturnedconsoledatonce:unspeakablyconsoled.
Herpresencewaswithme:itremainedwhileIrefilledthegrave,andledmehome.
Youmaylaugh,ifyouwill;butIwassureIshouldseeherthere.
Iwassureshewaswithme,andIcouldnothelptalkingtoher.
HavingreachedtheHeights,Irushedeagerlytothedoor.
Itwasfastened:and,IrememberthataccursedEarnshawandmywifeopposedmyentrance.
Irememberstoppingtokickthebreathoutofhim,andthenhurryingupstairs,tomyroomandhers.
Ilookedroundimpatiently—Ifeltherbyme—Icouldalmostseeher,andyetIcouldnot!
Ioughttohavesweatbloodthen,fromtheanguishofmyyearning—fromthefervourofmysupplicationstohavebutoneglimpse!Ihadnotone.
Sheshowedherself,assheoftenwasinlife,adeviltome!
And,sincethen,sometimesmoreandsometimesless,I’vebeenthesportofthatintolerabletorture!Infernal!
keepingmynervesatsuchastretch,that,iftheyhadnotresembledcatgut,theywouldlongagohaverelaxedtothefeeblenessofLinton’s.
WhenIsatinthehousewithHareton,itseemedthatongoingout,Ishouldmeether;whenIwalkedonthemoorsIshouldmeethercomingin.
WhenIwentfromhome,Ihastenedtoreturn:shemustbesomewhereattheHeights,Iwascertain!
AndwhenIsleptinherchamber—Iwasbeatenoutofthat.
Icouldn’tliethere;forthemomentIclosedmyeyes,shewaseitheroutsidethewindow,orslidingbackthepanels,orenteringtheroom,orevenrestingherdarlingheadonthesamepillowasshedidwhenachild;andImustopenmylidstosee.
AndsoIopenedandclosedthemahundredtimesanight—tobealwaysdisappointed!Itrackedme!I’veoftengroanedaloud.
tillthatoldrascalJosephnodoubtbelievedthatmyconsciencewasplayingthefiendinsideofme.
Now,sinceI’veseenher,I’mpacified—alittle.Itwasastrangewayofkilling!
notbyinches,butbyfractionsandhairbreadths,tobeguilemewiththespectreofahope,througheighteenyears!”
Mr.Heathcliffpausedandwipedhisforehead;hishairclungtoit,wetwithperspiration;hiseyeswerefixedontheredembersofthefire,thebrowsnotcontracted,butraisednextthetemples;diminishingthegrimaspectofhiscountenance,butimpartingapeculiarlookoftrouble,andapainfulappearanceofmentaltensiontowardsoneabsorbingsubject.
Heonlyhalfaddressedme,andImaintainedsilence.Ididn’tliketohearhimtalk!
Afterashortperiodheresumedhismeditationonthepicture,tookitdownandleantitagainstthesofatocontemplateitatbetteradvantage;andwhilesooccupiedCatherineentered,announcingthatshewasready,whenherponyshouldbesaddled.
“Sendthatoverto-morrow,”saidHeathclifftome;thenturningtoher,headded—“Youmaydowithoutyourpony:itisafineevening,andyou’llneednoponiesatWutheringHeights;forwhatjourneysyoutake,yourownfeetwillserveyou.Comealong.”
“Good-bye,Ellen!”whisperedmydearlittlemistress.Asshekissedme,herlipsfeltlikeice.“Comeandseeme,Ellen;don’tforget.”
“Takecareyoudonosuchthing,Mrs.Dean!”saidhernewfather.“WhenIwishtospeaktoyouI’llcomehere.Iwantnoneofyourpryingatmyhouse!”
Hesignedhertoprecedehim;andcastingbackalookthatcutmyheart,sheobeyed.
Iwatchedthemfromthewindow,walkdownthegarden.
HeathclifffixedCatherine’sarmunderhis:thoughshedisputedtheactatfirstevidently;andwithrapidstrideshehurriedherintothealley,whosetreesconcealedthem.
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