English
[ThemannerinwhichMr.Fairlie’sNarrativeandotherNarrativesthatareshortlytofollowit,wereoriginallyobtained,formsthesubjectofanexplanationwhichwillappearatalaterperiod.]
Itisthegrandmisfortuneofmylifethatnobodywillletmealone.
Why—Iaskeverybody—whyworryME?Nobodyanswersthatquestion,andnobodyletsmealone.
Relatives,friends,andstrangersallcombinetoannoyme.WhathaveIdone?
Iaskmyself,Iaskmyservant,Louis,fiftytimesaday—whathaveIdone?Neitherofuscantell.Mostextraordinary!
ThelastannoyancethathasassailedmeistheannoyanceofbeingcalledupontowritethisNarrative.
Isamaninmystateofnervouswretchednesscapableofwritingnarratives?
WhenIputthisextremelyreasonableobjection,Iamtoldthatcertainveryseriouseventsrelatingtomyniecehavehappenedwithinmyexperience,andthatIamthefitpersontodescribethemonthataccount.
IamthreatenedifIfailtoexertmyselfinthemannerrequired,withconsequenceswhichIcannotsomuchasthinkofwithoutperfectprostration.Thereisreallynoneedtothreatenme.
Shatteredbymymiserablehealthandmyfamilytroubles,Iamincapableofresistance.
Ifyouinsist,youtakeyourunjustadvantageofme,andIgivewayimmediately.
IwillendeavourtorememberwhatIcan(underprotest),andtowritewhatIcan(alsounderprotest),andwhatIcan’trememberandcan’twrite,Louismustrememberandwriteforme.
Heisanass,andIamaninvalid,andwearelikelytomakeallsortsofmistakesbetweenus.Howhumiliating!
Iamtoldtorememberdates.Goodheavens!Ineverdidsuchathinginmylife—howamItobeginnow?
IhaveaskedLouis.HeisnotquitesuchanassasIhavehithertosupposed.
Heremembersthedateoftheevent,withinaweekortwo—andIrememberthenameoftheperson.
ThedatewastowardstheendofJune,orthebeginningofJuly,andthename(inmyopinionaremarkablyvulgarone)wasFanny.
AttheendofJune,orthebeginningofJuly,then,Iwasreclininginmycustomarystate,surroundedbythevariousobjectsofArtwhichIhavecollectedaboutmetoimprovethetasteofthebarbarouspeopleinmyneighbourhood.
Thatistosay,Ihadthephotographsofmypictures,andprints,andcoins,andsoforth,allaboutme,whichIintend,oneofthesedays,topresent(thephotographs,Imean,iftheclumsyEnglishlanguagewillletmemeananything)topresenttotheinstitutionatCarlisle(horridplace!)
,withaviewtoimprovingthetastesofthemembers(GothsandVandalstoaman).
Itmightbesupposedthatagentlemanwhowasincourseofconferringagreatnationalbenefitonhiscountrymenwasthelastgentlemanintheworldtobeunfeelinglyworriedaboutprivatedifficultiesandfamilyaffairs.
Quiteamistake,Iassureyou,inmycase.
However,thereIwas,reclining,withmyart-treasuresaboutme,andwantingaquietmorning.
BecauseIwantedaquietmorning,ofcourseLouiscamein.
ItwasperfectlynaturalthatIshouldinquirewhatthedeucehemeantbymakinghisappearancewhenIhadnotrungmybell.
Iseldomswear—itissuchanungentlemanlikehabit—butwhenLouisansweredbyagrin,IthinkitwasalsoperfectlynaturalthatIshoulddamnhimforgrinning.Atanyrate,Idid.
Thisrigorousmodeoftreatment,Ihaveobserved,invariablybringspersonsinthelowerclassoflifetotheirsenses.ItbroughtLouistoHISsenses.
Hewassoobligingastoleaveoffgrinning,andinformmethataYoungPersonwasoutsidewantingtoseeme.
Headded(withtheodioustalkativenessofservants),thathernamewasFanny.
“WhoisFanny?”
“LadyGlyde’smaid,sir.”
“WhatdoesLadyGlyde’smaidwantwithme.
“Aletter,sir——”
“Takeit.”
“Sherefusestogiveittoanybodybutyou,sir.”
“Whosendstheletter?”
“MissHalcombe,sir.”
ThemomentIheardMissHalcombe’snameIgaveup.ItisahabitofminealwaystogiveuptoMissHalcombe.Ifind,byexperience,thatitsavesnoise.Igaveuponthisoccasion.DearMarian!
“LetLadyGlyde’smaidcomein,Louis.Stop!Dohershoescreak?”
Iwasobligedtoaskthequestion.Creakingshoesinvariablyupsetmefortheday.
IwasresignedtoseetheYoungPerson,butIwasNOTresignedtolettheYoungPerson’sshoesupsetme.Thereisalimiteventomyendurance.
Louisaffirmeddistinctlythathershoesweretobedependedupon.Iwavedmyhand.Heintroducedher.
Isitnecessarytosaythatsheexpressedhersenseofembarrassmentbyshuttinguphermouthandbreathingthroughhernose?
Tothestudentoffemalehumannatureinthelowerorders,surelynot.
Letmedothegirljustice.HershoesdidNOTcreak.
ButwhydoYoungPersonsinserviceallperspireatthehands?
Whyhavetheyallgotfatnosesandhardcheeks?
Andwhyaretheirfacessosadlyunfinished,especiallyaboutthecornersoftheeyelids?
Iamnotstrongenoughtothinkdeeplymyselfonanysubject,butIappealtoprofessionalmen,whoare.
WhyhavewenovarietyinourbreedofYoungPersons?
“Youhavealetterforme,fromMissHalcombe?Putitdownonthetable,please,anddon’tupsetanything.HowisMissHalcombe?”
“Verywell,thankyou,sir.”
“AndLadyGlyde?”
Ireceivednoanswer.TheYoungPerson’sfacebecamemoreunfinishedthanever,andIthinkshebegantocry.
Icertainlysawsomethingmoistabouthereyes.Tearsorperspiration?
Louis(whomIhavejustconsulted)isinclinedtothink,tears.
Heisinherclassoflife,andheoughttoknowbest.Letussay,tears.
ExceptwhentherefiningprocessofArtjudiciouslyremovesfromthemallresemblancetoNature,Idistinctlyobjecttotears.
TearsarescientificallydescribedasaSecretion.
Icanunderstandthatasecretionmaybehealthyorunhealthy,butIcannotseetheinterestofasecretionfromasentimentalpointofview.
Perhapsmyownsecretionsbeingallwrongtogether,Iamalittleprejudicedonthesubject.Nomatter.
Ibehaved,onthisoccasion,withallpossibleproprietyandfeeling.IclosedmyeyesandsaidtoLouis—
“Endeavourtoascertainwhatshemeans.”
Louisendeavoured,andtheYoungPersonendeavoured.
TheysucceededinconfusingeachothertosuchanextentthatIamboundincommongratitudetosay,theyreallyamusedme.
IthinkIshallsendforthemagainwhenIaminlowspirits.
IhavejustmentionedthisideatoLouis.
Strangetosay,itseemstomakehimuncomfortable.Poordevil!
SurelyIamnotexpectedtorepeatmyniece’smaid’sexplanationofhertears,interpretedintheEnglishofmySwissvalet?Thethingismanifestlyimpossible.
Icangivemyownimpressionsandfeelingsperhaps.Willthatdoaswell?Pleasesay,Yes.
Myideaisthatshebeganbytellingme(throughLouis)thathermasterhaddismissedherfromhermistress’sservice.
(Observe,throughout,thestrangeirrelevancyoftheYoungPerson.
Wasitmyfaultthatshehadlostherplace?)
Onherdismissal,shehadgonetotheinntosleep.
(Idon’tkeeptheinn—whymentionittoME?)
Betweensixo’clockandsevenMissHalcombehadcometosaygood-bye,andhadgivenhertwoletters,oneforme,andoneforagentlemaninLondon.
(IamnotagentlemaninLondon—hangthegentlemaninLondon!)
Shehadcarefullyputthetwolettersintoherbosom(whathaveItodowithherbosom?)
;shehadbeenveryunhappy,whenMissHalcombehadgoneawayagain;shehadnothadthehearttoputbitordropbetweenherlipstillitwasnearbedtime,andthen,whenitwascloseonnineo’clock,shehadthoughtsheshouldlikeacupoftea.
(AmIresponsibleforanyofthesevulgarfluctuations,whichbeginwithunhappinessandendwithtea?)
JustasshewasWARMINGTHEPOT(IgivethewordsontheauthorityofLouis,whosaysheknowswhattheymean,andwishestoexplain,butIsnubhimonprinciple)—justasshewaswarmingthepotthedooropened,andshewasSTRUCKOFAHEAP(herownwordsagain,andperfectlyunintelligiblethistimetoLouis,aswellastomyself)bytheappearanceintheinnparlourofherladyshiptheCountess.
Igivemyniece’smaid’sdescriptionofmysister’stitlewithasenseofthehighestrelish.
Mypoordearsisterisatiresomewomanwhomarriedaforeigner.
Toresume:thedooropened,herladyshiptheCountessappearedintheparlour,andtheYoungPersonwasstruckofaheap.Mostremarkable!
ImustreallyrestalittlebeforeIcangetonanyfarther.
WhenIhavereclinedforafewminutes,withmyeyesclosed,andwhenLouishasrefreshedmypoorachingtempleswithalittleeau-de-Cologne,Imaybeabletoproceed.
HerladyshiptheCountess——
No.Iamabletoproceed,butnottositup.Iwillreclineanddictate.Louishasahorridaccent,butheknowsthelanguage,andcanwrite.Howveryconvenient!
Herladyship,theCountess,explainedherunexpectedappearanceattheinnbytellingFannythatshehadcometobringoneortwolittlemessageswhichMissHalcombeinherhurryhadforgotten.
TheYoungPersonthereuponwaitedanxiouslytohearwhatthemessageswere,buttheCountessseemeddisinclinedtomentionthem(solikemysister’stiresomeway!)untilFannyhadhadhertea.
Herladyshipwassurprisinglykindandthoughtfulaboutit(extremelyunlikemysister),andsaid,“Iamsure,mypoorgirl,youmustwantyourtea.
Wecanletthemessageswaittillafterwards.
Come,come,ifnothingelsewillputyouatyourease,I’llmaketheteaandhaveacupwithyou.”
Ithinkthosewerethewords,asreportedexcitably,inmypresence,bytheYoungPerson.
Atanyrate,theCountessinsistedonmakingthetea,andcarriedherridiculousostentationofhumilitysofarastotakeonecupherself,andtoinsistonthegirl’stakingtheother.
Thegirldrankthetea,andaccordingtoherownaccount,solemnisedtheextraordinaryoccasionfiveminutesafterwardsbyfaintingdeadawayforthefirsttimeinherlife.HereagainIuseherownwords.
Louisthinkstheywereaccompaniedbyanincreasedsecretionoftears.Ican’tsaymyself.
TheeffortoflisteningbeingquiteasmuchasIcouldmanage,myeyeswereclosed.
WheredidIleaveoff?Ah,yes—shefaintedafterdrinkingacupofteawiththeCountess—aproceedingwhichmighthaveinterestedmeifIhadbeenhermedicalman,butbeingnothingofthesortIfeltboredbyhearingofit,nothingmore.
Whenshecametoherselfinhalfanhour’stimeshewasonthesofa,andnobodywaswithherbutthelandlady.
TheCountess,findingittoolatetoremainanylongerattheinn,hadgoneawayassoonasthegirlshowedsignsofrecovering,andthelandladyhadbeengoodenoughtohelpherupstairstobed.
Leftbyherself,shehadfeltinherbosom(Iregretthenecessityofreferringtothispartofthesubjectasecondtime),andhadfoundthetwoletterstherequitesafe,butstrangelycrumpled.
Shehadbeengiddyinthenight,buthadgotupwellenoughtotravelinthemorning.
Shehadputtheletteraddressedtothatobtrusivestranger,thegentlemaninLondonintothepost,andhadnowdeliveredtheotherletterintomyhandsasshewastold.
Thiswastheplaintruth,andthoughshecouldnotblameherselfforanyintentionalneglect,shewassadlytroubledinhermind,andsadlyinwantofawordofadvice.
AtthispointLouisthinksthesecretionsappearedagain.
Perhapstheydid,butitisofinfinitelygreaterimportancetomentionthatatthispointalsoIlostmypatience,openedmyeyes,andinterfered.
“Whatisthepurportofallthis?”Iinquired.
Myniece’sirrelevantmaidstared,andstoodspeechless.
“Endeavourtoexplain,”Isaidtomyservant.“Translateme,Louis.”
Louisendeavouredandtranslated.Inotherwords,hedescendedimmediatelyintoabottomlesspitofconfusion,andtheYoungPersonfollowedhimdown.
Ireallydon’tknowwhenIhavebeensoamused.
Ileftthematthebottomofthepitaslongastheydivertedme.
Whentheyceasedtodivertme,Iexertedmyintelligence,andpulledthemupagain.
Itisunnecessarytosaythatmyinterferenceenabledme,induecourseoftime,toascertainthepurportoftheYoungPerson’sremarks.
Idiscoveredthatshewasuneasyinhermind,becausethetrainofeventsthatshehadjustdescribedtomehadpreventedherfromreceivingthosesupplementarymessageswhichMissHalcombehadintrustedtotheCountesstodeliver.
Shewasafraidthemessagesmighthavebeenofgreatimportancetohermistress’sinterests.
HerdreadofSirPercivalhaddeterredherfromgoingtoBlackwaterParklateatnighttoinquireaboutthem,andMissHalcombe’sowndirectionstoher,onnoaccounttomissthetraininthemorning,hadpreventedherfromwaitingattheinnthenextday.
Shewasmostanxiousthatthemisfortuneofherfainting-fitshouldnotleadtothesecondmisfortuneofmakinghermistressthinkherneglectful,andshewouldhumblybegtoaskmewhetherIwouldadvisehertowriteherexplanationsandexcusestoMissHalcombe,requestingtoreceivethemessagesbyletter,ifitwasnottoolate.
Imakenoapologiesforthisextremelyprosyparagraph.Ihavebeenorderedtowriteit.
Therearepeople,unaccountableasitmayappear,whoactuallytakemoreinterestinwhatmyniece’smaidsaidtomeonthisoccasionthaninwhatIsaidtomyniece’smaid.Amusingperversity!
“Ishouldfeelverymuchobligedtoyou,sir,ifyouwouldkindlytellmewhatIhadbetterdo,”remarkedtheYoungPerson.
“Letthingsstopastheyare,”Isaid,adaptingmylanguagetomylistener.“Iinvariablyletthingsstopastheyare.Yes.Isthatall?”
“Ifyouthinkitwouldbealibertyinme,sir,towrite,ofcourseIwouldn’tventuretodoso.ButIamsoveryanxioustodoallIcantoservemymistressfaithfully——”
Peopleinthelowerclassoflifeneverknowwhenorhowtogooutofaroom.
Theyinvariablyrequiretobehelpedoutbytheirbetters.
IthoughtithightimetohelptheYoungPersonout.Ididitwithtwojudiciouswords—
“Good-morning.”
Somethingoutsideorinsidethissingulargirlsuddenlycreaked.
Louis,whowaslookingather(whichIwasnot),saysshecreakedwhenshecurtseyed.Curious.
Wasithershoes,herstays,orherbones?Louisthinksitwasherstays.Mostextraordinary!
AssoonasIwasleftbymyselfIhadalittlenap—Ireallywantedit.
WhenIawokeagainInoticeddearMarian’sletter.
IfIhadhadtheleastideaofwhatitcontainedIshouldcertainlynothaveattemptedtoopenit.
Being,unfortunatelyformyself,quiteinnocentofallsuspicion,Ireadtheletter.Itimmediatelyupsetmefortheday.
Iam,bynature,oneofthemosteasy-temperedcreaturesthateverlived—Imakeallowancesforeverybody,andItakeoffenceatnothing.
ButasIhavebeforeremarked,therearelimitstomyendurance.
IlaiddownMarian’sletter,andfeltmyself—justlyfeltmyself—aninjuredman.
Iamabouttomakearemark.Itis,ofcourse,applicabletotheveryseriousmatternowundernotice,orIshouldnotallowittoappearinthisplace.
Nothing,inmyopinion,setstheodiousselfishnessofmankindinsucharepulsivelyvividlightasthetreatment,inallclassesofsociety,whichtheSinglepeoplereceiveatthehandsoftheMarriedpeople.
Whenyouhaveonceshownyourselftooconsiderateandself-denyingtoaddafamilyofyourowntoanalreadyovercrowdedpopulation,youarevindictivelymarkedoutbyyourmarriedfriends,whohavenosimilarconsiderationandnosimilarself-denial,astherecipientofhalftheirconjugaltroubles,andthebornfriendofalltheirchildren.
HusbandsandwivesTALKofthecaresofmatrimony,andbachelorsandspinstersBEARthem.Takemyowncase.
Iconsideratelyremainsingle,andmypoordearbrotherPhilipinconsideratelymarries.Whatdoeshedowhenhedies?HeleaveshisdaughtertoME.
Sheisasweetgirl—sheisalsoadreadfulresponsibility.Whylayheronmyshoulders?
BecauseIambound,intheharmlesscharacterofasingleman,torelievemymarriedconnectionsofalltheirowntroubles.
Idomybestwithmybrother’sresponsibility—Imarrymyniece,withinfinitefussanddifficulty,tothemanherfatherwantedhertomarry.
Sheandherhusbanddisagree,andunpleasantconsequencesfollow.
Whatdoesshedowiththoseconsequences?ShetransfersthemtoME.WhytransferthemtoME?
BecauseIambound,intheharmlesscharacterofasingleman,torelievemymarriedconnectionsofalltheirowntroubles.Poorsinglepeople!Poorhumannature!
ItisquiteunnecessarytosaythatMarian’sletterthreatenedme.Everybodythreatensme.
AllsortsofhorrorsweretofallonmydevotedheadifIhesitatedtoturnLimmeridgeHouseintoanasylumformynieceandhermisfortunes.Ididhesitate,nevertheless.
Ihavementionedthatmyusualcourse,hitherto,hadbeentosubmittodearMarian,andsavenoise.
Butonthisoccasion,theconsequencesinvolvedinherextremelyinconsiderateproposalwereofanaturetomakemepause.
IfIopenedLimmeridgeHouseasanasylumtoLadyGlyde,whatsecurityhadIagainstSirPercivalGlyde’sfollowingherhereinastateofviolentresentmentagainstMEforharbouringhiswife?
IsawsuchaperfectlabyrinthoftroublesinvolvedinthisproceedingthatIdeterminedtofeelmyground,asitwere.
Iwrote,therefore,todearMariantobeg(asshehadnohusbandtolayclaimtoher)thatshewouldcomeherebyherself,first,andtalkthematteroverwithme.
Ifshecouldanswermyobjectionstomyownperfectsatisfaction,thenIassuredherthatIwouldreceiveoursweetLaurawiththegreatestpleasure,butnototherwise.
Ifelt,ofcourse,atthetime,thatthistemporisingonmypartwouldprobablyendinbringingMarianhereinastateofvirtuousindignation,bangingdoors.
Butthen,theothercourseofproceedingmightendinbringingSirPercivalhereinastateofvirtuousindignation,bangingdoorsalso,andofthetwoindignationsandbangingsIpreferredMarian’s,becauseIwasusedtoher.
AccordinglyIdespatchedtheletterbyreturnofpost.
Itgainedmetime,atallevents—and,ohdearme!whatapointthatwastobeginwith.
WhenIamtotallyprostrated(didImentionthatIwastotallyprostratedbyMarian’sletter?)
italwaystakesmethreedaystogetupagain.
Iwasveryunreasonable—Iexpectedthreedaysofquiet.OfcourseIdidn’tgetthem.
Thethirdday’spostbroughtmeamostimpertinentletterfromapersonwithwhomIwastotallyunacquainted.
Hedescribedhimselfastheactingpartnerofourmanofbusiness—ourdear,pig-headedoldGilmore—andheinformedmethathehadlatelyreceived,bythepost,aletteraddressedtohiminMissHalcombe’shandwriting.
Onopeningtheenvelope,hehaddiscovered,tohisastonishment,thatitcontainednothingbutablanksheetofnotepaper.
Thiscircumstanceappearedtohimsosuspicious(assuggestingtohisrestlesslegalmindthattheletterhadbeentamperedwith)thathehadatoncewrittentoMissHalcombe,andhadreceivednoanswerbyreturnofpost.
Inthisdifficulty,insteadofactinglikeasensiblemanandlettingthingstaketheirpropercourse,hisnextabsurdproceeding,onhisownshowing,wastopestermebywritingtoinquireifIknewanythingaboutit.WhatthedeuceshouldIknowaboutit?Whyalarmmeaswellashimself?Iwrotebacktothateffect.Itwasoneofmykeenestletters.
IhaveproducednothingwithasharperepistolaryedgetoitsinceItenderedhisdismissalinwritingtothatextremelytroublesomeperson,Mr.WalterHartright.
Myletterproduceditseffect.Iheardnothingmorefromthelawyer.
Thisperhapswasnotaltogethersurprising.
ButitwascertainlyaremarkablecircumstancethatnosecondletterreachedmefromMarian,andthatnowarningsignsappearedofherarrival.
Herunexpectedabsencedidmeamazinggood.
Itwassoverysoothingandpleasanttoinfer(asIdidofcourse)thatmymarriedconnectionshadmadeitupagain.
Fivedaysofundisturbedtranquillity,ofdelicioussingleblessedness,quiterestoredme.
OnthesixthdayIfeltstrongenoughtosendformyphotographer,andtosethimatworkagainonthepresentationcopiesofmyart-treasures,withaview,asIhavealreadymentioned,totheimprovementoftasteinthisbarbarousneighbourhood.
Ihadjustdismissedhimtohisworkshop,andhadjustbeguncoquettingwithmycoins,whenLouissuddenlymadehisappearancewithacardinhishand.
“AnotherYoungPerson?”Isaid.“Iwon’tseeher.InmystateofhealthYoungPersonsdisagreewithme.Notathome.”
“Itisagentlemanthistime,sir”
Agentlemanofcoursemadeadifference.Ilookedatthecard.
GraciousHeaven!mytiresomesister’sforeignhusband,CountFosco.
IsitnecessarytosaywhatmyfirstimpressionwaswhenIlookedatmyvisitor’scard?Surelynot!
Mysisterhavingmarriedaforeigner,therewasbutoneimpressionthatanymaninhissensescouldpossiblyfeel.
OfcoursetheCounthadcometoborrowmoneyofme.
“Louis,”Isaid,“doyouthinkhewouldgoawayifyougavehimfiveshillings?”
Louislookedquiteshocked.Hesurprisedmeinexpressiblybydeclaringthatmysister’sforeignhusbandwasdressedsuperbly,andlookedthepictureofprosperity.
Underthesecircumstancesmyfirstimpressionalteredtoacertainextent.
InowtookitforgrantedthattheCounthadmatrimonialdifficultiesofhisowntocontendwith,andthathehadcome,liketherestofthefamily,tocastthemallonmyshoulders.
“Didhementionhisbusiness?”Iasked.
“CountFoscosaidhehadcomehere,sir,becauseMissHalcombewasunabletoleaveBlackwaterPark.”
Freshtroubles,apparently.Notexactlyhisown,asIhadsupposed,butdearMarian’s.Troubles,anyway.Ohdear!
“Showhimin,”Isaidresignedly.
TheCount’sfirstappearancereallystartledme.
HewassuchanalarminglylargepersonthatIquitetrembled.
Ifeltcertainthathewouldshakethefloorandknockdownmyart-treasures.Hedidneithertheonenortheother.
Hewasrefreshinglydressedinsummercostume—hismannerwasdelightfullyself-possessedandquiet—hehadacharmingsmile.
Myfirstimpressionofhimwashighlyfavourable.
Itisnotcreditabletomypenetration—asthesequelwillshow—toacknowledgethis,butIamanaturallycandidman,andIDOacknowledgeitnotwithstanding.
“Allowmetopresentmyself,Mr.Fairlie,”hesaid.
“IcomefromBlackwaterPark,andIhavethehonourandthehappinessofbeingMadameFosco’shusband.
Letmetakemyfirstandlastadvantageofthatcircumstancebyentreatingyounottomakeastrangerofme.
Ibegyouwillnotdisturbyourself—Ibegyouwillnotmove.”
“Youareverygood,”Ireplied.“IwishIwasstrongenoughtogetup.CharmedtoseeyouatLimmeridge.Pleasetakeachair.”
“Iamafraidyouaresufferingto-day,”saidtheCount.
“Asusual,”Isaid.“Iamnothingbutabundleofnervesdresseduptolooklikeaman.”
“Ihavestudiedmanysubjectsinmytime,”remarkedthissympatheticperson.
“Amongotherstheinexhaustiblesubjectofnerves.
MayImakeasuggestion,atoncethesimplestandthemostprofound?
Willyouletmealterthelightinyourroom?
“Certainly—ifyouwillbesoverykindasnottoletanyofitinonme.”
Hewalkedtothewindow.SuchacontrasttodearMarian!soextremelyconsiderateinallhismovements!
“Light,”hesaid,inthatdelightfullyconfidentialtonewhichissosoothingtoaninvalid,“isthefirstessential.Lightstimulates,nourishes,preserves.
Youcannomoredowithoutit,Mr.Fairlie,thanifyouwereaflower.Observe.
Here,whereyousit,Iclosetheshutterstocomposeyou.
There,whereyoudoNOTsit,Idrawuptheblindandletintheinvigoratingsun.
Admitthelightintoyourroomifyoucannotbearitonyourself.
Light,sir,isthegranddecreeofProvidence.
YouacceptProvidencewithyourownrestrictions.Acceptlightonthesameterms.”
Ithoughtthisveryconvincingandattentive.Hehadtakenmeinuptothatpointaboutthelight,hehadcertainlytakenmein.
“Youseemeconfused,”hesaid,returningtohisplace—“onmywordofhonour,Mr.Fairlie,youseemeconfusedinyourpresence.”
“Shockedtohearit,Iamsure.MayIinquirewhy?”
“Sir,canIenterthisroom(whereyousitasufferer),andseeyousurroundedbytheseadmirableobjectsofArt,withoutdiscoveringthatyouareamanwhosefeelingsareacutelyimpressionable,whosesympathiesareperpetuallyalive?Tellme,canIdothis?”
IfIhadbeenstrongenoughtositupinmychairIshould,ofcourse,havebowed.Notbeingstrongenough,Ismiledmyacknowledgmentsinstead.Itdidjustaswell,webothunderstoodoneanother.
“Prayfollowmytrainofthought,”continuedtheCount.
“Isithere,amanofrefinedsympathiesmyself,inthepresenceofanothermanofrefinedsympathiesalso.
Iamconsciousofaterriblenecessityforlaceratingthosesympathiesbyreferringtodomesticeventsofaverymelancholykind.Whatistheinevitableconsequence?
Ihavedonemyselfthehonourofpointingitouttoyoualready.Isitconfused.”
WasitatthispointthatIbegantosuspecthewasgoingtoboreme?Iratherthinkitwas.
“Isitabsolutelynecessarytorefertotheseunpleasantmatters?”Iinquired.“InourhomelyEnglishphrase,CountFosco,won’ttheykeep?”
TheCount,withthemostalarmingsolemnity,sighedandshookhishead.
“MustIreallyhearthem?”
Heshruggedhisshoulders(itwasthefirstforeignthinghehaddonesincehehadbeenintheroom),andlookedatmeinanunpleasantlypenetratingmanner.
MyinstinctstoldmethatIhadbetterclosemyeyes.Iobeyedmyinstincts.
“Pleasebreakitgently,”Ipleaded.“Anybodydead?”
“Dead!”criedtheCount,withunnecessaryforeignfierceness.
“Mr.Fairlie,yournationalcomposureterrifiesme.
InthenameofHeaven,whathaveIsaidordonetomakeyouthinkmethemessengerofdeath?”
“Prayacceptmyapologies,”Ianswered.“Youhavesaidanddonenothing.
Imakeitaruleinthesedistressingcasesalwaystoanticipatetheworst.
Itbreakstheblowbymeetingithalf-way,andsoon.
Inexpressiblyrelieved,Iamsure,tohearthatnobodyisdead.Anybodyill?”
Iopenedmyeyesandlookedathim.Washeveryyellowwhenhecamein,orhadheturnedveryyellowinthelastminuteortwo?
Ireallycan’tsay,andIcan’taskLouis,becausehewasnotintheroomatthetime.
“Anybodyill?”Irepeated,observingthatmynationalcomposurestillappearedtoaffecthim.
“Thatispartofmybadnews,Mr.Fairlie.Yes.Somebodyisill.”
“Grieved,Iamsure.Whichofthemisit?”
“Tomyprofoundsorrow,MissHalcombe.Perhapsyouwereinsomedegreepreparedtohearthis?
PerhapswhenyoufoundthatMissHalcombedidnotcomeherebyherself,asyouproposed,anddidnotwriteasecondtime,youraffectionateanxietymayhavemadeyoufearthatshewasill?”
Ihavenodoubtmyaffectionateanxietyhadledtothatmelancholyapprehensionatsometimeorother,butatthemomentmywretchedmemoryentirelyfailedtoremindmeofthecircumstance.
However,Isaidyes,injusticetomyself.Iwasmuchshocked.
ItwassoveryuncharacteristicofsucharobustpersonasdearMariantobeill,thatIcouldonlysupposeshehadmetwithanaccident.
Ahorse,orafalsesteponthestairs,orsomethingofthatsort.
“Isitserious?”Iasked.
“Serious—beyondadoubt,”hereplied.“Dangerous—Ihopeandtrustnot.
MissHalcombeunhappilyexposedherselftobewettedthroughbyaheavyrain.
Thecoldthatfollowedwasofanaggravatedkind,andithasnowbroughtwithittheworstconsequence—fever.”
WhenIheardthewordfever,andwhenIrememberedatthesamemomentthattheunscrupulouspersonwhowasnowaddressingmehadjustcomefromBlackwaterPark,IthoughtIshouldhavefaintedonthespot.
“GoodGod!”Isaid.“Isitinfectious?”
“Notatpresent,”heanswered,withdetestablecomposure.
“Itmayturntoinfection—butnosuchdeplorablecomplicationhadtakenplacewhenIleftBlackwaterPark.
Ihavefeltthedeepestinterestinthecase,Mr.Fairlie—Ihaveendeavouredtoassisttheregularmedicalattendantinwatchingit—acceptmypersonalassurancesoftheuninfectiousnatureofthefeverwhenIlastsawit.”
Accepthisassurances!Ineverwasfartherfromacceptinganythinginmylife.
Iwouldnothavebelievedhimonhisoath.Hewastooyellowtobebelieved.
Helookedlikeawalking-West-Indian-epidemic.
Hewasbigenoughtocarrytyphusbytheton,andtodyetheverycarpethewalkedonwithscarletfever.
Incertainemergenciesmymindisremarkablysoonmadeup.
Iinstantlydeterminedtogetridofhim.
“Youwillkindlyexcuseaninvalid,”Isaid—“butlongconferencesofanykindinvariablyupsetme.MayIbegtoknowexactlywhattheobjectistowhichIamindebtedforthehonourofyourvisit?”
Iferventlyhopedthatthisremarkablybroadhintwouldthrowhimoffhisbalance—confusehim—reducehimtopoliteapologies—inshort,gethimoutoftheroom.
Onthecontrary,itonlysettledhiminhischair.
Hebecameadditionallysolemn,anddignified,andconfidential.
Hehelduptwoofhishorridfingersandgavemeanotherofhisunpleasantlypenetratinglooks.WhatwasItodo?
Iwasnotstrongenoughtoquarrelwithhim.Conceivemysituation,ifyouplease.Islanguageadequatetodescribeit?Ithinknot.
“Theobjectsofmyvisit,”hewenton,quiteirrepressibly,“arenumberedonmyfingers.Theyaretwo.
First,Icometobearmytestimony,withprofoundsorrow,tothelamentabledisagreementsbetweenSirPercivalandLadyGlyde.
IamSirPercival’soldestfriend—IamrelatedtoLadyGlydebymarriage—Iamaneye-witnessofallthathashappenedatBlackwaterPark.
InthosethreecapacitiesIspeakwithauthority,withconfidence,withhonourableregret.
Sir,Iinformyou,astheheadofLadyGlyde’sfamily,thatMissHalcombehasexaggeratednothingintheletterwhichshewrotetoyouraddress.
Iaffirmthattheremedywhichthatadmirableladyhasproposedistheonlyremedythatwillspareyouthehorrorsofpublicscandal.
Atemporaryseparationbetweenhusbandandwifeistheonepeaceablesolutionofthisdifficulty.
Partthemforthepresent,andwhenallcausesofirritationareremoved,I,whohavenowthehonourofaddressingyou—IwillundertaketobringSirPercivaltoreason.
LadyGlydeisinnocent,LadyGlydeisinjured,but—followmythoughthere!
—sheis,onthatveryaccount(Isayitwithshame),thecauseofirritationwhilesheremainsunderherhusband’sroof.
Nootherhousecanreceiveherwithproprietybutyours.Iinviteyoutoopenit.”
Cool.HerewasamatrimonialhailstormpouringintheSouthofEngland,andIwasinvited,byamanwithfeverineveryfoldofhiscoat,tocomeoutfromtheNorthofEnglandandtakemyshareofthepelting.
Itriedtoputthepointforcibly,justasIhaveputithere.
TheCountdeliberatelyloweredoneofhishorridfingers,kepttheotherup,andwenton—rodeoverme,asitwere,withouteventhecommoncoach-manlikeattentionofcrying“Hi!”beforeheknockedmedown.
“Followmythoughtoncemore,ifyouplease,”heresumed.“Myfirstobjectyouhaveheard.
MysecondobjectincomingtothishouseistodowhatMissHalcombe’sillnesshaspreventedherfromdoingforherself.
MylargeexperienceisconsultedonalldifficultmattersatBlackwaterPark,andmyfriendlyadvicewasrequestedontheinterestingsubjectofyourlettertoMissHalcombe.
Iunderstoodatonce—formysympathiesareyoursympathies—whyyouwishedtoseeherherebeforeyoupledgedyourselftoinvitingLadyGlyde.
Youaremostright,sir,inhesitatingtoreceivethewifeuntilyouarequitecertainthatthehusbandwillnotexerthisauthoritytoreclaimher.Iagreetothat.
Ialsoagreethatsuchdelicateexplanationsasthisdifficultyinvolvesarenotexplanationswhichcanbeproperlydisposedofbywritingonly.
Mypresencehere(tomyowngreatinconvenience)istheproofthatIspeaksincerely.
Asfortheexplanationsthemselves,I—Fosco—I,whoknowSirPercivalmuchbetterthanMissHalcombeknowshim,affirmtoyou,onmyhonourandmyword,thathewillnotcomenearthishouse,orattempttocommunicatewiththishouse,whilehiswifeislivinginit.Hisaffairsareembarrassed.
OfferhimhisfreedombymeansoftheabsenceofLadyGlyde.
Ipromiseyouhewilltakehisfreedom,andgobacktotheContinentattheearliestmomentwhenhecangetaway.Isthiscleartoyouascrystal?Yes,itis.Haveyouquestionstoaddresstome?Beitso,Iamheretoanswer.
Ask,Mr.Fairlie—obligemebyaskingtoyourheart’scontent.”
Hehadsaidsomuchalreadyinspiteofme,andhelookedsodreadfullycapableofsayingagreatdealmorealsoinspiteofme,thatIdeclinedhisamiableinvitationinpureself-defence.
“Manythanks,”Ireplied.“Iamsinkingfast.
InmystateofhealthImusttakethingsforgranted.Allowmetodosoonthisoccasion.Wequiteunderstandeachother.Yes.
Muchobliged,Iamsure,foryourkindinterference.
IfIevergetbetter,andeverhaveasecondopportunityofimprovingouracquaintance”
Hegotup.Ithoughthewasgoing.No.Moretalk,moretimeforthedevelopmentofinfectiousinfluences—inmyroom,too—rememberthat,inmyroom!
“Onemomentyet,”hesaid,“onemomentbeforeItakemyleave.
Iaskpermissionatpartingtoimpressonyouanurgentnecessity.Itisthis,sir.
YoumustnotthinkofwaitingtillMissHalcomberecoversbeforeyoureceiveLadyGlyde.
MissHalcombehastheattendanceofthedoctor,ofthehousekeeperatBlackwaterPark,andofanexperiencednurseaswell—threepersonsforwhosecapacityanddevotionIanswerwithmylife.Itellyouthat.
Itellyou,also,thattheanxietyandalarmofhersister’sillnesshasalreadyaffectedthehealthandspiritsofLadyGlyde,andhasmadehertotallyunfittobeofuseinthesick-room.
Herpositionwithherhusbandgrowsmoreandmoredeplorableanddangerouseveryday.
IfyouleaveheranylongeratBlackwaterPark,youdonothingwhatevertohastenhersister’srecovery,andatthesametime,youriskthepublicscandal,whichyouandI,andallofus,areboundinthesacredinterestsofthefamilytoavoid.
Withallmysoul,IadviseyoutoremovetheseriousresponsibilityofdelayfromyourownshouldersbywritingtoLadyGlydetocomehereatonce.
Doyouraffectionate,yourhonourable,yourinevitableduty,andwhateverhappensinthefuture,noonecanlaytheblameonyou.
Ispeakfrommylargeexperience—Ioffermyfriendlyadvice.Isitaccepted—Yes,orNo?”
Ilookedathim—merelylookedathim—withmysenseofhisamazingassurance,andmydawningresolutiontoringforLouisandhavehimshownoutoftheroomexpressedineverylineofmyface.
Itisperfectlyincredible,butquitetrue,thatmyfacedidnotappeartoproducetheslightestimpressiononhim.
Bornwithoutnerves—evidentlybornwithoutnerves.
“Youhesitate?”hesaid.“Mr.Fairlie!Iunderstandthathesitation.
Youobject—see,sir,howmysympathieslookstraightdownintoyourthoughts!
—youobjectthatLadyGlydeisnotinhealthandnotinspiritstotakethelongjourney,fromHampshiretothisplace,byherself.
Herownmaidisremovedfromher,asyouknow,andofotherservantsfittotravelwithher,fromoneendofEnglandtoanother,therearenoneatBlackwaterPark.
Youobject,again,thatshecannotcomfortablystopandrestinLondon,onherwayhere,becauseshecannotcomfortablygoalonetoapublichotelwheresheisatotalstranger.
Inonebreath,Igrantbothobjections—inanotherbreath,Iremovethem.
Followme,ifyouplease,forthelasttime.
Itwasmyintention,whenIreturnedtoEnglandwithSirPercival,tosettlemyselfintheneighbourhoodofLondon.
Thatpurposehasjustbeenhappilyaccomplished.
Ihavetaken,forsixmonths,alittlefurnishedhouseinthequartercalledSt.John’sWood.
Besoobligingastokeepthisfactinyourmind,andobservetheprogrammeInowpropose.
LadyGlydetravelstoLondon(ashortjourney)—Imyselfmeetheratthestation—Itakehertorestandsleepatmyhouse,whichisalsothehouseofheraunt—whensheisrestoredIescorthertothestationagain—shetravelstothisplace,andherownmaid(whoisnowunderyourroof)receivesheratthecarriage-door.
Hereiscomfortconsulted—herearetheinterestsofproprietyconsulted—hereisyourownduty—dutyofhospitality,sympathy,protection,toanunhappyladyinneedofallthree—smoothedandmadeeasy,fromthebeginningtotheend.
Icordiallyinviteyou,sir,tosecondmyeffortsinthesacredinterestsofthefamily.
Iseriouslyadviseyoutowrite,bymyhands,offeringthehospitalityofyourhouse(andheart),andthehospitalityofmyhouse(andheart),tothatinjuredandunfortunateladywhosecauseIpleadto-day.”
Hewavedhishorridhandatme—hestruckhisinfectiousbreast—headdressedmeoratorically,asifIwaslaidupintheHouseofCommons.
Itwashightimetotakeadesperatecourseofsomesort.
ItwasalsohightimetosendforLouis,andadopttheprecautionoffumigatingtheroom.
Inthistryingemergencyanideaoccurredtome—aninestimableideawhich,sotospeak,killedtwointrusivebirdswithonestone.
IdeterminedtogetridoftheCount’stiresomeeloquence,andofLadyGlyde’stiresometroubles,bycomplyingwiththisodiousforeigner’srequest,andwritingtheletteratonce.
Therewasnottheleastdangeroftheinvitationbeingaccepted,fortherewasnottheleastchancethatLaurawouldconsenttoleaveBlackwaterParkwhileMarianwaslyingthereill.
HowthischarminglyconvenientobstaclecouldhaveescapedtheofficiouspenetrationoftheCount,itwasimpossibletoconceive—butitHADescapedhim.
Mydreadthathemightyetdiscoverit,ifIallowedhimanymoretimetothink,stimulatedmetosuchanamazingdegree,thatIstruggledintoasittingposition—seized,reallyseized,thewritingmaterialsbymyside,andproducedtheletterasrapidlyasifIhadbeenacommonclerkinanoffice.
“DearestLaura,Pleasecome,wheneveryoulike.
BreakthejourneybysleepinginLondonatyouraunt’shouse.
GrievedtohearofdearMarian’sillness.Everaffectionatelyyours.”
Ihandedtheselines,atarm’slength,totheCount—Isankbackinmychair—Isaid,“Excuseme—Iamentirelyprostrated—Icandonomore.Willyourestandlunchdownstairs?Lovetoall,andsympathy,andsoon.Good-morning.”
Hemadeanotherspeech—themanwasabsolutelyinexhaustible.
Iclosedmyeyes—Iendeavouredtohearaslittleaspossible.
InspiteofmyendeavoursIwasobligedtohearagreatdeal.
Mysister’sendlesshusbandcongratulatedhimself,andcongratulatedme,ontheresultofourinterview—hementionedagreatdealmoreabouthissympathiesandmine—hedeploredmymiserablehealth—heofferedtowritemeaprescription—heimpressedonmethenecessityofnotforgettingwhathehadsaidabouttheimportanceoflight—heacceptedmyobliginginvitationtorestandlunch—herecommendedmetoexpectLadyGlydeintwoorthreedays’time—hebeggedmypermissiontolookforwardtoournextmeeting,insteadofpaininghimselfandpainingme,bysayingfarewell—headdedagreatdealmore,which,Irejoicetothink,Ididnotattendtoatthetime,anddonotremembernow.
Iheardhissympatheticvoicetravellingawayfrommebydegrees—but,largeashewas,Ineverheardhim.
Hehadthenegativemeritofbeingabsolutelynoiseless.
Idon’tknowwhenheopenedthedoor,orwhenheshutit.
Iventuredtomakeuseofmyeyesagain,afteranintervalofsilence—andhewasgone.
IrangforLouis,andretiredtomybathroom.
Tepidwater,strengthenedwitharomaticvinegar,formyself,andcopiousfumigationformystudy,weretheobviousprecautionstotake,andofcourseIadoptedthem.
Irejoicetosaytheyprovedsuccessful.Ienjoyedmycustomarysiesta.Iawokemoistandcool.
MyfirstinquirieswerefortheCount.Hadwereallygotridofhim?
Yes—hehadgoneawaybytheafternoontrain.Hadhelunched,andifso,uponwhat?Entirelyuponfruit-tartandcream.Whataman!Whatadigestion!
AmIexpectedtosayanythingmore?Ibelievenot.
IbelieveIhavereachedthelimitsassignedtome.
Theshockingcircumstanceswhichhappenedatalaterperioddidnot,Iamthankfultosay,happeninmypresence.
Idobegandentreatthatnobodywillbesoveryunfeelingastolayanypartoftheblameofthosecircumstancesonme.Idideverythingforthebest.
Iamnotanswerableforadeplorablecalamity,whichitwasquiteimpossibletoforesee.
Iamshatteredbyit—Ihavesufferedunderit,asnobodyelsehassuffered.
Myservant,Louis(whoisreallyattachedtomeinhisunintelligentway),thinksIshallnevergetoverit.
Heseesmedictatingatthismoment,withmyhandkerchieftomyeyes.
Iwishtomention,injusticetomyself,thatitwasnotmyfault,andthatIamquiteexhaustedandheartbroken.NeedIsaymore?
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