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Thevisionsofromancewereover.Catherinewascompletelyawakened.
Henry’saddress,shortasithadbeen,hadmorethoroughlyopenedhereyestotheextravaganceofherlatefanciesthanalltheirseveraldisappointmentshaddone.Mostgrievouslywasshehumbled.Mostbitterlydidshecry.
Itwasnotonlywithherselfthatshewassunk—butwithHenry.
Herfolly,whichnowseemedevencriminal,wasallexposedtohim,andhemustdespiseherforever.
Thelibertywhichherimaginationhaddaredtotakewiththecharacterofhisfather—couldheeverforgiveit?
Theabsurdityofhercuriosityandherfears—couldtheyeverbeforgotten?
Shehatedherselfmorethanshecouldexpress.
Hehad—shethoughthehad,onceortwicebeforethisfatalmorning,shownsomethinglikeaffectionforher.
Butnow—inshort,shemadeherselfasmiserableaspossibleforabouthalfanhour,wentdownwhentheclockstruckfive,withabrokenheart,andcouldscarcelygiveanintelligibleanswertoEleanor’sinquiryifshewaswell.
TheformidableHenrysoonfollowedherintotheroom,andtheonlydifferenceinhisbehaviourtoherwasthathepaidherrathermoreattentionthanusual.
Catherinehadneverwantedcomfortmore,andhelookedasifhewasawareofit.
Theeveningworeawaywithnoabatementofthissoothingpoliteness;andherspiritsweregraduallyraisedtoamodesttranquillity.
Shedidnotlearneithertoforgetordefendthepast;butshelearnedtohopethatitwouldnevertranspirefarther,andthatitmightnotcostherHenry’sentireregard.
Herthoughtsbeingstillchieflyfixedonwhatshehadwithsuchcauselessterrorfeltanddone,nothingcouldshortlybeclearerthanthatithadbeenallavoluntary,self–createddelusion,eachtriflingcircumstancereceivingimportancefromanimaginationresolvedonalarm,andeverythingforcedtobendtoonepurposebyamindwhich,beforesheenteredtheabbey,hadbeencravingtobefrightened.
SherememberedwithwhatfeelingsshehadpreparedforaknowledgeofNorthanger.
Shesawthattheinfatuationhadbeencreated,themischiefsettled,longbeforeherquittingBath,anditseemedasifthewholemightbetracedtotheinfluenceofthatsortofreadingwhichshehadthereindulged.
CharmingaswereallMrs.Radcliffe’sworks,andcharmingevenasweretheworksofallherimitators,itwasnotinthemperhapsthathumannature,atleastintheMidlandcountiesofEngland,wastobelookedfor.
OftheAlpsandPyrenees,withtheirpineforestsandtheirvices,theymightgiveafaithfuldelineation;andItaly,Switzerland,andthesouthofFrancemightbeasfruitfulinhorrorsastheywerethererepresented.
Catherinedarednotdoubtbeyondherowncountry,andevenofthat,ifhardpressed,wouldhaveyieldedthenorthernandwesternextremities.
ButinthecentralpartofEnglandtherewassurelysomesecurityfortheexistenceevenofawifenotbeloved,inthelawsoftheland,andthemannersoftheage.
Murderwasnottolerated,servantswerenotslaves,andneitherpoisonnorsleepingpotionstobeprocured,likerhubarb,fromeverydruggist.
AmongtheAlpsandPyrenees,perhaps,therewerenomixedcharacters.
There,suchaswerenotasspotlessasanangelmighthavethedispositionsofafiend.
ButinEnglanditwasnotso;amongtheEnglish,shebelieved,intheirheartsandhabits,therewasageneralthoughunequalmixtureofgoodandbad.
Uponthisconviction,shewouldnotbesurprisedifeveninHenryandEleanorTilney,someslightimperfectionmighthereafterappear;anduponthisconvictionsheneednotfeartoacknowledgesomeactualspecksinthecharacteroftheirfather,who,thoughclearedfromthegrosslyinjurioussuspicionswhichshemusteverblushtohaveentertained,shedidbelieve,uponseriousconsideration,tobenotperfectlyamiable.
Hermindmadeupontheseseveralpoints,andherresolutionformed,ofalwaysjudgingandactinginfuturewiththegreatestgoodsense,shehadnothingtodobuttoforgiveherselfandbehappierthanever;andthelenienthandoftimedidmuchforherbyinsensiblegradationsinthecourseofanotherday.
Henry’sastonishinggenerosityandnoblenessofconduct,inneveralludingintheslightestwaytowhathadpassed,wasofthegreatestassistancetoher;andsoonerthanshecouldhavesupposeditpossibleinthebeginningofherdistress,herspiritsbecameabsolutelycomfortable,andcapable,asheretofore,ofcontinualimprovementbyanythinghesaid.
Therewerestillsomesubjects,indeed,underwhichshebelievedtheymustalwaystremble—thementionofachestoracabinet,forinstance—andshedidnotlovethesightofjapaninanyshape:butevenshecouldallowthatanoccasionalmementoofpastfolly,howeverpainful,mightnotbewithoutuse.
Theanxietiesofcommonlifebegansoontosucceedtothealarmsofromance.
HerdesireofhearingfromIsabellagreweverydaygreater.
ShewasquiteimpatienttoknowhowtheBathworldwenton,andhowtheroomswereattended;andespeciallywassheanxioustobeassuredofIsabella’shavingmatchedsomefinenetting–cotton,onwhichshehadleftherintent;andofhercontinuingonthebesttermswithJames.
HeronlydependenceforinformationofanykindwasonIsabella.
JameshadprotestedagainstwritingtohertillhisreturntoOxford;andMrs.AllenhadgivenhernohopesofalettertillshehadgotbacktoFullerton.
ButIsabellahadpromisedandpromisedagain;andwhenshepromisedathing,shewassoscrupulousinperformingit!Thismadeitsoparticularlystrange!
Forninesuccessivemornings,Catherinewonderedovertherepetitionofadisappointment,whicheachmorningbecamemoresevere:but,onthetenth,whensheenteredthebreakfast–room,herfirstobjectwasaletter,heldoutbyHenry’swillinghand.
Shethankedhimasheartilyasifhehadwrittenithimself.
“’TisonlyfromJames,however,”asshelookedatthedirection.
Sheopenedit;itwasfromOxford;andtothispurpose:
“DearCatherine,
“Though,Godknows,withlittleinclinationforwriting,IthinkitmydutytotellyouthateverythingisatanendbetweenMissThorpeandme.
IleftherandBathyesterday,nevertoseeeitheragain.
Ishallnotenterintoparticulars—theywouldonlypainyoumore.
Youwillsoonhearenoughfromanotherquartertoknowwhereliestheblame;andIhopewillacquityourbrotherofeverythingbutthefollyoftooeasilythinkinghisaffectionreturned.ThankGod!Iamundeceivedintime!Butitisaheavyblow!
Aftermyfather’sconsenthadbeensokindlygiven—butnomoreofthis.Shehasmadememiserableforever!
Letmesoonhearfromyou,dearCatherine;youaremyonlyfriend;yourloveIdobuildupon.
IwishyourvisitatNorthangermaybeoverbeforeCaptainTilneymakeshisengagementknown,oryouwillbeuncomfortablycircumstanced.
PoorThorpeisintown:Idreadthesightofhim;hishonestheartwouldfeelsomuch.Ihavewrittentohimandmyfather.
Herduplicityhurtsmemorethanall;tilltheverylast,ifIreasonedwithher,shedeclaredherselfasmuchattachedtomeasever,andlaughedatmyfears.
IamashamedtothinkhowlongIborewithit;butifevermanhadreasontobelievehimselfloved,Iwasthatman.
Icannotunderstandevennowwhatshewouldbeat,fortherecouldbenoneedofmybeingplayedofftomakehersecureofTilney.
Wepartedatlastbymutualconsent—happyformehadwenevermet!
Icanneverexpecttoknowsuchanotherwoman!
DearestCatherine,bewarehowyougiveyourheart.“Believeme,”&c.
Catherinehadnotreadthreelinesbeforehersuddenchangeofcountenance,andshortexclamationsofsorrowingwonder,declaredhertobereceivingunpleasantnews;andHenry,earnestlywatchingherthroughthewholeletter,sawplainlythatitendednobetterthanitbegan.
Hewasprevented,however,fromevenlookinghissurprisebyhisfather’sentrance.
Theywenttobreakfastdirectly;butCatherinecouldhardlyeatanything.
Tearsfilledhereyes,andevenrandownhercheeksasshesat.
Theletterwasonemomentinherhand,theninherlap,andtheninherpocket;andshelookedasifsheknewnotwhatshedid.
Thegeneral,betweenhiscocoaandhisnewspaper,hadluckilynoleisurefornoticingher;buttotheothertwoherdistresswasequallyvisible.
Assoonasshedaredleavethetableshehurriedawaytoherownroom;butthehousemaidswerebusyinit,andshewasobligedtocomedownagain.
Sheturnedintothedrawing–roomforprivacy,butHenryandEleanorhadlikewiseretreatedthither,andwereatthatmomentdeepinconsultationabouther.
Shedrewback,tryingtobegtheirpardon,butwas,withgentleviolence,forcedtoreturn;andtheotherswithdrew,afterEleanorhadaffectionatelyexpressedawishofbeingofuseorcomforttoher.
Afterhalfanhour’sfreeindulgenceofgriefandreflection,Catherinefeltequaltoencounteringherfriends;butwhethersheshouldmakeherdistressknowntothemwasanotherconsideration.
Perhaps,ifparticularlyquestioned,shemightjustgiveanidea—justdistantlyhintatit—butnotmore.
Toexposeafriend,suchafriendasIsabellahadbeentoher—andthentheirownbrothersocloselyconcernedinit!
Shebelievedshemustwaivethesubjectaltogether.
HenryandEleanorwerebythemselvesinthebreakfast–room;andeach,assheenteredit,lookedatheranxiously.
Catherinetookherplaceatthetable,and,afterashortsilence,Eleanorsaid,“NobadnewsfromFullerton,Ihope?
Mr.andMrs.Morland—yourbrothersandsisters—Ihopetheyarenoneofthemill?”
“No,Ithankyou”(sighingasshespoke);“theyareallverywell.MyletterwasfrommybrotheratOxford.”
Nothingfurtherwassaidforafewminutes;andthenspeakingthroughhertears,sheadded,“IdonotthinkIshalleverwishforaletteragain!”
“Iamsorry,”saidHenry,closingthebookhehadjustopened;“ifIhadsuspectedtheletterofcontaininganythingunwelcome,Ishouldhavegivenitwithverydifferentfeelings.”
“Itcontainedsomethingworsethananybodycouldsuppose!PoorJamesissounhappy!Youwillsoonknowwhy.”
“Tohavesokind–hearted,soaffectionateasister,”repliedHenrywarmly,“mustbeacomforttohimunderanydistress.”
“Ihaveonefavourtobeg,”saidCatherine,shortlyafterwards,inanagitatedmanner,“that,ifyourbrothershouldbecominghere,youwillgivemenoticeofit,thatImaygoaway.”
“Ourbrother!Frederick!”
“Yes;IamsureIshouldbeverysorrytoleaveyousosoon,butsomethinghashappenedthatwouldmakeitverydreadfulformetobeinthesamehousewithCaptainTilney.”
Eleanor’sworkwassuspendedwhileshegazedwithincreasingastonishment;butHenrybegantosuspectthetruth,andsomething,inwhichMissThorpe’snamewasincluded,passedhislips.
“Howquickyouare!”criedCatherine:“youhaveguessedit,Ideclare!
Andyet,whenwetalkedaboutitinBath,youlittlethoughtofitsendingso.
Isabella—nowondernowIhavenotheardfromher—Isabellahasdesertedmybrother,andistomarryyours!
Couldyouhavebelievedtherehadbeensuchinconstancyandfickleness,andeverythingthatisbadintheworld?”
“Ihope,sofarasconcernsmybrother,youaremisinformed.
IhopehehasnothadanymaterialshareinbringingonMr.Morland’sdisappointment.
HismarryingMissThorpeisnotprobable.Ithinkyoumustbedeceivedsofar.
IamverysorryforMr.Morland—sorrythatanyoneyouloveshouldbeunhappy;butmysurprisewouldbegreateratFrederick’smarryingherthanatanyotherpartofthestory.”
“Itisverytrue,however;youshallreadJames’sletteryourself.Stay—Thereisonepart—“recollectingwithablushthelastline.
“Willyoutakethetroubleofreadingtousthepassageswhichconcernmybrother?”
“No,readityourself,”criedCatherine,whosesecondthoughtswereclearer.
“IdonotknowwhatIwasthinkingof”(blushingagainthatshehadblushedbefore);“Jamesonlymeanstogivemegoodadvice.”
Hegladlyreceivedtheletter,and,havingreaditthrough,withcloseattention,returneditsaying,“Well,ifitistobeso,IcanonlysaythatIamsorryforit.
Frederickwillnotbethefirstmanwhohaschosenawifewithlesssensethanhisfamilyexpected.
Idonotenvyhissituation,eitherasaloverorason.”
MissTilney,atCatherine’sinvitation,nowreadtheletterlikewise,and,havingexpressedalsoherconcernandsurprise,begantoinquireintoMissThorpe’sconnectionsandfortune.
“Hermotherisaverygoodsortofwoman,”wasCatherine’sanswer.
“Whatwasherfather?”
“Alawyer,Ibelieve.TheyliveatPutney.”
“Aretheyawealthyfamily?”
“No,notvery.IdonotbelieveIsabellahasanyfortuneatall:butthatwillnotsignifyinyourfamily.Yourfatherissoveryliberal!
Hetoldmetheotherdaythatheonlyvaluedmoneyasitallowedhimtopromotethehappinessofhischildren.”
Thebrotherandsisterlookedateachother.
“But,”saidEleanor,afterashortpause,“woulditbetopromotehishappiness,toenablehimtomarrysuchagirl?
Shemustbeanunprincipledone,orshecouldnothaveusedyourbrotherso.
AndhowstrangeaninfatuationonFrederick’sside!
Agirlwho,beforehiseyes,isviolatinganengagementvoluntarilyenteredintowithanotherman!Isnotitinconceivable,Henry?
Fredericktoo,whoalwaysworehisheartsoproudly!
Whofoundnowomangoodenoughtobeloved!”
“Thatisthemostunpromisingcircumstance,thestrongestpresumptionagainsthim.
WhenIthinkofhispastdeclarations,Igivehimup.
Moreover,IhavetoogoodanopinionofMissThorpe’sprudencetosupposethatshewouldpartwithonegentlemanbeforetheotherwassecured.ItisalloverwithFrederickindeed!
Heisadeceasedman—defunctinunderstanding.
Prepareforyoursister–in–law,Eleanor,andsuchasister–in–lawasyoumustdelightin!
Open,candid,artless,guileless,withaffectionsstrongbutsimple,formingnopretensions,andknowingnodisguise.”
“Suchasister–in–law,Henry,Ishoulddelightin,”saidEleanorwithasmile.
“Butperhaps,”observedCatherine,“thoughshehasbehavedsoillbyourfamily,shemaybehavebetterbyyours.Nowshehasreallygotthemanshelikes,shemaybeconstant.”
“IndeedIamafraidshewill,”repliedHenry;“Iamafraidshewillbeveryconstant,unlessabaronetshouldcomeinherway;thatisFrederick’sonlychance.
IwillgettheBathpaper,andlookoverthearrivals.”
“Youthinkitisallforambition,then?
And,uponmyword,therearesomethingsthatseemverylikeit.
Icannotforgetthat,whenshefirstknewwhatmyfatherwoulddoforthem,sheseemedquitedisappointedthatitwasnotmore.
Ineverwassodeceivedinanyone’scharacterinmylifebefore.”
“Amongallthegreatvarietythatyouhaveknownandstudied.”
“Myowndisappointmentandlossinherisverygreat;but,asforpoorJames,Isupposehewillhardlyeverrecoverit.”
“Yourbrotheriscertainlyverymuchtobepitiedatpresent;butwemustnot,inourconcernforhissufferings,undervalueyours.
Youfeel,Isuppose,thatinlosingIsabella,youlosehalfyourself:youfeelavoidinyourheartwhichnothingelsecanoccupy.
Societyisbecomingirksome;andasfortheamusementsinwhichyouwerewonttoshareatBath,theveryideaofthemwithoutherisabhorrent.
Youwouldnot,forinstance,nowgotoaballfortheworld.
Youfeelthatyouhavenolongeranyfriendtowhomyoucanspeakwithunreserve,onwhoseregardyoucanplacedependence,orwhosecounsel,inanydifficulty,youcouldrelyon.Youfeelallthis?”
“No,”saidCatherine,afterafewmoments’reflection,“Idonot—oughtI?
Tosaythetruth,thoughIamhurtandgrieved,thatIcannotstillloveher,thatIamnevertohearfromher,perhapsnevertoseeheragain,Idonotfeelsovery,verymuchafflictedasonewouldhavethought.”
“Youfeel,asyoualwaysdo,whatismosttothecreditofhumannature.Suchfeelingsoughttobeinvestigated,thattheymayknowthemselves.”
Catherine,bysomechanceorother,foundherspiritssoverymuchrelievedbythisconversationthatshecouldnotregretherbeingledon,thoughsounaccountably,tomentionthecircumstancewhichhadproducedit.
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