Mysister,Mrs.JoeGargery,wasmorethantwentyyearsolderthanI,andhadestablishedagreatreputationwithherselfandtheneighboursbecauseshehadbroughtmeup“byhand.” Havingatthattimetofindoutformyselfwhattheexpressionmeant,andknowinghertohaveahardandheavyhand,andtobemuchinthehabitoflayingituponherhusbandaswellasuponme,IsupposedthatJoeGargeryandIwerebothbroughtupbyhand. Shewasnotagood—lookingwoman,mysister;andIhadageneralimpressionthatshemusthavemadeJoeGargerymarryherbyhand. Joewasafairman,withcurlsofflaxenhaironeachsideofhissmoothface,andwitheyesofsuchaveryundecidedbluethattheyseemedtohavesomehowgotmixedwiththeirownwhites. Hewasamild,good—natured,sweet—tempered,easy—going,foolish,dearfellow—asortofHerculesinstrength,andalsoinweakness. Mysister,Mrs.Joe,withblackhairandeyes,hadsuchaprevailingrednessofskinthatIsometimesusedtowonderwhetheritwaspossibleshewashedherselfwithanutmeg—graterinsteadofsoap. Shewastallandbony,andalmostalwaysworeacoarseapron,fastenedoverherfigurebehindwithtwoloops,andhavingasquareimpregnablebibinfront,thatwasstuckfullofpinsandneedles. Shemadeitapowerfulmeritinherself,andastrongreproachagainstJoe,thatsheworethisapronsomuch. ThoughIreallyseenoreasonwhysheshouldhavewornitatall:orwhy,ifshedidwearitatall,sheshouldnothavetakenitoff,everydayofherlife. Joe’sforgeadjoinedourhouse,whichwasawoodenhouse,asmanyofthedwellingsinourcountrywere—mostofthem,atthattime. WhenIranhomefromthechurchyard,theforgewasshutup,andJoewassittingaloneinthekitchen. JoeandIbeingfellow—sufferers,andhavingconfidencesassuch,Joeimpartedaconfidencetome,themomentIraisedthelatchofthedoorandpeepedinathimoppositetoit,sittinginthechimneycorner. “Mrs.Joehasbeenoutadozentimes,lookingforyou,Pip.Andshe’soutnow,makingitabaker’sdozen.” “Yes,Pip,”saidJoe;“andwhat’sworse,she’sgotTicklerwithher.” Atthisdismalintelligence,Itwistedtheonlybuttononmywaistcoatroundandround,andlookedingreatdepressionatthefire. Ticklerwasawax—endedpieceofcane,wornsmoothbycollisionwithmytickledframe. “Shesotdown,”saidJoe,“andshegotup,andshemadeagrabatTickler,andsheRam—pagedout. That’swhatshedid,”saidJoe,slowlyclearingthefirebetweenthelowerbarswiththepoker,andlookingatit:“sheRam—pagedout,Pip.” “Hasshebeengonelong,Joe?”Ialwaystreatedhimasalargerspeciesofchild,andasnomorethanmyequal. “Well,”saidJoe,glancingupattheDutchclock,“she’sbeenontheRam—page,thislastspell,aboutfiveminutes,Pip.She’sa—coming! Getbehindthedoor,oldchap,andhavethejack—towelbetwixtyou.” Itooktheadvice.Mysister,Mrs.Joe,throwingthedoorwideopen,andfindinganobstructionbehindit,immediatelydivinedthecause,andappliedTicklertoitsfurtherinvestigation. Sheconcludedbythrowingme—Ioftenservedasaconnubialmissile—atJoe,who,gladtogetholdofmeonanyterms,passedmeonintothechimneyandquietlyfencedmeuptherewithhisgreatleg. “Wherehaveyoubeen,youyoungmonkey?”saidMrs.Joe,stampingherfoot. “Tellmedirectlywhatyou’vebeendoingtowearmeawaywithfretandfrightandworrit,orI’dhaveyououtofthatcornerifyouwasfiftyPips,andhewasfivehundredGargerys.” “Ihaveonlybeentothechurchyard,”saidI,frommystool,cryingandrubbingmyself. “Churchyard!”repeatedmysister.“Ifitwarn’tformeyou’dhavebeentothechurchyardlongago,andstayedthere.Whobroughtyouupbyhand?” “AndwhydidIdoit,Ishouldliketoknow?”exclaimedmysister. “Idon’t!”saidmysister.“I’dneverdoitagain!Iknowthat. ImaytrulysayI’veneverhadthisapronofmineoff,sincebornyouwere. It’sbadenoughtobeablacksmith’swife(andhimaGargery)withoutbeingyourmother.” MythoughtsstrayedfromthatquestionasIlookeddisconsolatelyatthefire. For,thefugitiveoutonthemarsheswiththeironedleg,themysteriousyoungman,thefile,thefood,andthedreadfulpledgeIwasundertocommitalarcenyonthoseshelteringpremises,rosebeforemeintheavengingcoals. “Hah!”saidMrs.Joe,restoringTicklertohisstation.“Churchyard,indeed!Youmaywellsaychurchyard,youtwo.” Oneofus,by—the—bye,hadnotsaiditatall. “You’lldrivemetothechurchyardbetwixtyou,oneofthesedays,andoh,apr—r—reciouspairyou’dbewithoutme!” Assheappliedherselftosetthetea—things,Joepeepeddownatmeoverhisleg,asifhewerementallycastingmeandhimselfup,andcalculatingwhatkindofpairwepracticallyshouldmake,underthegrievouscircumstancesforeshadowed. Afterthat,hesatfeelinghisright—sideflaxencurlsandwhisker,andfollowingMrs.Joeaboutwithhisblueeyes,ashismanneralwayswasatsquallytimes. Mysisterhadatrenchantwayofcuttingourbread—and—butterforus,thatnevervaried. First,withherlefthandshejammedtheloafhardandfastagainstherbib—whereitsometimesgotapinintoit,andsometimesaneedle,whichweafterwardsgotintoourmouths. Thenshetooksomebutter(nottoomuch)onaknifeandspreaditontheloaf,inanapothecarykindofway,asifsheweremakingaplaister—usingbothsidesoftheknifewithaslappingdexterity,andtrimmingandmouldingthebutteroffroundthecrust. Then,shegavetheknifeafinalsmartwipeontheedgeoftheplaister,andthensawedaverythickroundofftheloaf:whichshefinally,beforeseparatingfromtheloaf,hewedintotwohalves,ofwhichJoegotone,andItheother. Onthepresentoccasion,thoughIwashungry,Idarednoteatmyslice. IfeltthatImusthavesomethinginreserveformydreadfulacquaintance,andhisallythestillmoredreadfulyoungman. IknewMrs.Joe’shousekeepingtobeofthestrictestkind,andthatmylarcenousresearchesmightfindnothingavailableinthesafe. ThereforeIresolvedtoputmyhunkofbread—and—butterdownthelegofmytrousers. Theeffortofresolutionnecessarytotheachievementofthispurpose,Ifoundtobequiteawful. ItwasasifIhadtomakeupmymindtoleapfromthetopofahighhouse,orplungeintoagreatdepthofwater. AnditwasmadethemoredifficultbytheunconsciousJoe. Inouralready—mentionedfreemasonryasfellow—sufferers,andinhisgood—naturedcompanionshipwithme,itwasoureveninghabittocomparethewaywebitthroughourslices,bysilentlyholdingthemuptoeachother’sadmirationnowandthen—whichstimulatedustonewexertions. To—night,Joeseveraltimesinvitedme,bythedisplayofhisfast—diminishingslice,toenteruponourusualfriendlycompetition;buthefoundme,eachtime,withmyyellowmugofteaononeknee,andmyuntouchedbread—and—butterontheother. Atlast,IdesperatelyconsideredthatthethingIcontemplatedmustbedone,andthatithadbestbedoneintheleastimprobablemannerconsistentwiththecircumstances. ItookadvantageofamomentwhenJoehadjustlookedatme,andgotmybread—and—butterdownmyleg. Joewasevidentlymadeuncomfortablebywhathesupposedtobemylossofappetite,andtookathoughtfulbiteoutofhisslice,whichhedidn’tseemtoenjoy. Heturneditaboutinhismouthmuchlongerthanusual,ponderingoveritagooddeal,andafterallgulpeditdownlikeapill. Hewasabouttotakeanotherbite,andhadjustgothisheadononesideforagoodpurchaseonit,whenhiseyefellonme,andhesawthatmybread—and—butterwasgone. ThewonderandconsternationwithwhichJoestoppedonthethresholdofhisbiteandstaredatme,weretooevidenttoescapemysister’sobservation. “What’sthematternow?”saidshe,smartly,assheputdownhercup. “Isay,youknow!”mutteredJoe,shakinghisheadatmeinveryseriousremonstrance.“Pip,oldchap!You’lldoyourselfamischief.It’llsticksomewhere.Youcan’thavechawedit,Pip.” “What’sthematternow?”repeatedmysister,moresharplythanbefore. “Ifyoucancoughanytrifleonitup,Pip,I’drecommendyoutodoit,”saidJoe,allaghast.“Mannersismanners,butstillyourelth’syourelth.” Bythistime,mysisterwasquitedesperate,soshepouncedonJoe,and,takinghimbythetwowhiskers,knockedhisheadforalittlewhileagainstthewallbehindhim:whileIsatinthecorner,lookingguiltilyon. “Now,perhapsyou’llmentionwhat’sthematter,”saidmysister,outofbreath,“youstaringgreatstuckpig.” Joelookedatherinahelplessway;thentookahelplessbite,andlookedatmeagain. “Youknow,Pip,”saidJoe,solemnly,withhislastbiteinhischeekandspeakinginaconfidentialvoice,asifwetwowerequitealone,“youandmeisalwaysfriends,andI’dbethelasttotelluponyou,anytime. Butsucha——”hemovedhischairandlookedaboutthefloorbetweenus,andthenagainatme—“suchamostoncommonBoltasthat!” “Beenboltinghisfood,hashe?”criedmysister. “Youknow,oldchap,”saidJoe,lookingatme,andnotatMrs.Joe,withhisbitestillinhischeek,“IBolted,myself,whenIwasyourage—frequent—andasaboyI’vebeenamongamanyBolters;butIneverseeyourBoltingequalyet,Pip,andit’samercyyouain’tBolteddead.” Mysistermadeadiveatme,andfishedmeupbythehair:sayingnothingmorethantheawfulwords,“Youcomealongandbedosed.” SomemedicalbeasthadrevivedTar—waterinthosedaysasafinemedicine,andMrs.Joealwayskeptasupplyofitinthecupboard;havingabeliefinitsvirtuescorrespondenttoitsnastiness. Atthebestoftimes,somuchofthiselixirwasadministeredtomeasachoicerestorative,thatIwasconsciousofgoingabout,smellinglikeanewfence. Onthisparticulareveningtheurgencyofmycasedemandedapintofthismixture,whichwaspoureddownmythroat,formygreatercomfort,whileMrs.Joeheldmyheadunderherarm,asabootwouldbeheldinaboot—jack. Joegotoffwithhalfapint;butwasmadetoswallowthat(muchtohisdisturbance,ashesatslowlymunchingandmeditatingbeforethefire),“becausehehadhadaturn.” Judgingfrommyself,Ishouldsayhecertainlyhadaturnafterwards,ifhehadhadnonebefore. Conscienceisadreadfulthingwhenitaccusesmanorboy;butwhen,inthecaseofaboy,thatsecretburdenco—operateswithanothersecretburdendownthelegofhistrousers,itis(asIcantestify)agreatpunishment. TheguiltyknowledgethatIwasgoingtorobMrs.Joe—IneverthoughtIwasgoingtorobJoe,forIneverthoughtofanyofthehousekeepingpropertyashis—unitedtothenecessityofalwayskeepingonehandonmybread—and—butterasIsat,orwhenIwasorderedaboutthekitchenonanysmallerrand,almostdrovemeoutofmymind. Then,asthemarshwindsmadethefireglowandflare,IthoughtIheardthevoiceoutside,ofthemanwiththeirononhislegwhohadswornmetosecrecy,declaringthathecouldn’tandwouldn’tstarveuntilto—morrow,butmustbefednow. Atothertimes,Ithought,Whatiftheyoungmanwhowaswithsomuchdifficultyrestrainedfromimbruinghishandsinme,shouldyieldtoaconstitutionalimpatience,orshouldmistakethetime,andshouldthinkhimselfaccreditedtomyheartandliverto—night,insteadofto—morrow! Ifeveranybody’shairstoodonendwithterror,minemusthavedonesothen.But,perhaps,nobody’severdid? ItwasChristmasEve,andIhadtostirthepuddingfornextday,withacopper—stick,fromseventoeightbytheDutchclock. Itrieditwiththeloaduponmyleg(andthatmademethinkafreshofthemanwiththeloadonhisleg),andfoundthetendencyofexercisetobringthebread—and—butteroutatmyankle,quiteunmanageable. Happily,Islippedaway,anddepositedthatpartofmyconscienceinmygarretbedroom. “Hark!”saidI,whenIhaddonemystirring,andwastakingafinalwarminthechimneycornerbeforebeingsentuptobed;“wasthatgreatguns,Joe?” “Ah!”saidJoe.“There’sanotherconwictoff.” “Whatdoesthatmean,Joe?”saidI. Mrs.Joe,whoalwaystookexplanationsuponherself,said,snappishly,“Escaped.Escaped.”AdministeringthedefinitionlikeTar—water. WhileMrs.Joesatwithherheadbendingoverherneedlework,IputmymouthintotheformsofsayingtoJoe,“What’saconvict?” Joeputhismouthintotheformsofreturningsuchahighlyelaborateanswer,thatIcouldmakeoutnothingofitbutthesingleword“Pip.” “Therewasaconwictofflastnight,”saidJoe,aloud,“aftersun—set—gun.Andtheyfiredwarningofhim.Andnow,itappearsthey’refiringwarningofanother.” “Dratthatboy,”interposedmysister,frowningatmeoverherwork,“whataquestionerheis.Asknoquestions,andyou’llbetoldnolies.” Itwasnotverypolitetoherself,Ithought,toimplythatIshouldbetoldliesbyher,evenifIdidaskquestions.Butsheneverwaspolite,unlesstherewascompany. Atthispoint,Joegreatlyaugmentedmycuriositybytakingtheutmostpainstoopenhismouthverywide,andtoputitintotheformofawordthatlookedtomelike“sulks.” Therefore,InaturallypointedtoMrs.Joe,andputmymouthintotheformofsaying“her?” ButJoewouldn’thearofthat,atall,andagainopenedhismouthverywide,andshooktheformofamostemphaticwordoutofit.ButIcouldmakenothingoftheword. “Mrs.Joe,”saidI,asalastresort,“Ishouldliketoknow—ifyouwouldn’tmuchmind—wherethefiringcomesfrom?” “Lordblesstheboy!”exclaimedmysister,asifshedidn’tquitemeanthat,butratherthecontrary.“FromtheHulks!” “Oh—h!”saidI,lookingatJoe.“Hulks!” Joegaveareproachfulcough,asmuchastosay,“Well,Itoldyouso.” “Andpleasewhat’sHulks?”saidI. “That’sthewaywiththisboy!”exclaimedmysister,pointingmeoutwithherneedleandthread,andshakingherheadatme. “Answerhimonequestion,andhe’llaskyouadozendirectly. Hulksareprison—ships,right‘crossth’meshes.” Wealwaysusedthatnameformarshes,inourcountry. “Iwonderwho’sputintoprison—ships,andwhythey’reputthere?”saidI,inageneralway,andwithquietdesperation. ItwastoomuchforMrs.Joe,whoimmediatelyrose. “Itellyouwhat,youngfellow,”saidshe,“Ididn’tbringyouupbyhandtobadgerpeople’slivesout. Itwouldbeblametome,andnotpraise,ifIhad. PeopleareputintheHulksbecausetheymurder,andbecausetheyrob,andforge,anddoallsortsofbad;andtheyalwaysbeginbyaskingquestions.Now,yougetalongtobed!” Iwasneverallowedacandletolightmetobed,and,asIwentupstairsinthedark,withmyheadtingling—fromMrs.Joe’sthimblehavingplayedthetambourineuponit,toaccompanyherlastwords—IfeltfearfullysensibleofthegreatconveniencethattheHulkswerehandyforme.Iwasclearlyonmywaythere. Ihadbegunbyaskingquestions,andIwasgoingtorobMrs.Joe. Sincethattime,whichisfarenoughawaynow,Ihaveoftenthoughtthatfewpeopleknowwhatsecrecythereisintheyoung,underterror. Nomatterhowunreasonabletheterror,sothatitbeterror. Iwasinmortalterroroftheyoungmanwhowantedmyheartandliver;Iwasinmortalterrorofmyinterlocutorwiththeironedleg;Iwasinmortalterrorofmyself,fromwhomanawfulpromisehadbeenextracted;Ihadnohopeofdeliverancethroughmyall—powerfulsister,whorepulsedmeateveryturn;IamafraidtothinkofwhatImighthavedone,onrequirement,inthesecrecyofmyterror. IfIsleptatallthatnight,itwasonlytoimaginemyselfdriftingdowntheriveronastrongspring—tide,totheHulks;aghostlypiratecallingouttomethroughaspeaking—trumpet,asIpassedthegibbet—station,thatIhadbettercomeashoreandbehangedthereatonce,andnotputitoff. Iwasafraidtosleep,evenifIhadbeeninclined,forIknewthatatthefirstfaintdawnofmorningImustrobthepantry. Therewasnodoingitinthenight,fortherewasnogettingalightbyeasyfrictionthen;tohavegotone,Imusthavestruckitoutofflintandsteel,andhavemadeanoiseliketheverypiratehimselfrattlinghischains. Assoonasthegreatblackvelvetpalloutsidemylittlewindowwasshotwithgrey,Igotupandwentdownstairs;everyboardupontheway,andeverycrackineveryboard,callingafterme,“Stopthief!”and“Getup,Mrs.Joe!” Inthepantry,whichwasfarmoreabundantlysuppliedthanusual,owingtotheseason,Iwasverymuchalarmed,byaharehangingupbytheheels,whomIratherthoughtIcaught,whenmybackwashalfturned,winking. Ihadnotimeforverification,notimeforselection,notimeforanything,forIhadnotimetospare. Istolesomebread,somerindofcheese,abouthalfajarofmincemeat(whichItiedupinmypocket—handkerchiefwithmylastnight’sslice),somebrandyfromastonebottle(whichIdecantedintoaglassbottleIhadsecretlyusedformakingthatintoxicatingfluid,Spanish—liquorice—water,upinmyroom:dilutingthestonebottlefromajuginthekitchencupboard),ameatbonewithverylittleonit,andabeautifulroundcompactporkpie. Iwasnearlygoingawaywithoutthepie,butIwastemptedtomountuponashelf,tolookwhatitwasthatwasputawaysocarefullyinacoveredearthenwaredishinacorner,andIfounditwasthepie,andItookit,inthehopethatitwasnotintendedforearlyuse,andwouldnotbemissedforsometime. Therewasadoorinthekitchen,communicatingwiththeforge;Iunlockedandunboltedthatdoor,andgotafilefromamongJoe’stools. Then,IputthefasteningsasIhadfoundthem,openedthedooratwhichIhadenteredwhenIranhomelastnight,shutit,andranforthemistymarshes.